A Lesson In Snapchat
Whilst the exams are looming, and the Hallward is filling, you’re going to be inundated with Snapchats. The Tab has jumped on the bandwagon…
For the sorry souls who still have a Blackberry, you need not read this article. iPhone and Android users, please continue as we give you a lesson in the best and worst ways to treat your friends on Snapchat.
Whilst this is a great app and a great way to make light of appalling selfies, some of you have been abusing it. Nothing rattles your cage more than a crap Snapchat.
No body has any time for snapshots of your boring life. Give us than well-constructed and well-timed snaps to get me through the revision instead.
To help those who still haven’t a clue, here’s a compilation of the best and worst snapchats:
Best Snapchats
1. Videos
These come in first. Everyone loves it when people take the piss out of themselves: videos of you singing, videos of drunk escapades, videos of questionable actions….we just wish that we could save them for future lols!
2. Lad photos
Lizard fights, nudity, booze…lads on tour – your laddish behaviour always makes for good viewing. Take photos of your antics and send them around. Girls, don’t worry, you can also get involved in our favourite snapchat game, take a photo of your elbow and send it to your recent chirpse: “Boobs or bum”.
3. Arty photos
Take yourself back to your vandalism days at schools; you need not sketch penises into the table when you’ve got Snapchat.
Although beware, detail is crucial. Check out Trent boy Charlie Saunders and Matt ‘the lad’ Smith from Greenwich caught here having a cheeky wank in spoons.
4. Nasties
When it comes to selfies, the uglier the better. Chiefly, it makes us feel better about ourselves, when much needed pick me ups are few and far between during the exam season. This isn’t Instagram, so whack the second count down to 3 and set free your hideous selfies.
See, even Hugh Stu Week One Cara Hyde can have a laugh with a selfie.
5. Hangover selfies
No more than 5 seconds, take a cheeky selfie of your post-Crisis plight. These are hilarious and always a winner. Hangover snapchats are a stalwart of the app, Rutland Lad George Carter here shares his pain on a Thursday.
Worst Snapchats
1. Genitalia
Well that was uncomfortable. Do you screenshot this profanity? Whether it’s attractive or not, screenshotting these snapchats could give them the wrong idea. You certainly can’t tell anyone else about this awkward situation, nor can you save the photo to the wankbank.
Avoid.
2. Food
Boring, boring, boring. Bloody pepperazzi. Get this crap off snapchat and onto Instagram if it’s that photo-worthy. No-one cares about your Boots Meal Deal.
3. Posers
We can tell that this is your 4th attempt at an attractive shot of yourself. “BIG NIGHT OUT” captions do very little to make this worth our time. Grow a pair and live a little, make it ugly!
4. People we don’t know
You have no idea who the other person is, and quite frankly you don’t care. Your uninteresting in your Athletic Union night at your crappy local Vodka Revs is clogging up our Snapchat feeds. Stop wasting everyone’s time.
5. Your boring shit
Some people use Snapchat to give you a commentary of their crappy day. Constant snap chats of them in the library – “SO MUCH WORK :(” – are unwelcome. we get it, you have exams, funnily enough, so does everyone else. So stop bloody bombarding everyone with your dull day.
So there you have it. The Five best and the five worst ways to bug your mates with Snapchat.