What would you look like if you were a member of the opposite sex?

‘I’d have a decent C cup, and a big bum’


You’ve got to make do with what you’ve got, but what if you were a member of the opposite sex? What would you want to look like?

While some pondered with despair and loathing, others had clearly given this a suspicious amount of thought.

Chevy, 27, Theatre company

“I come from a long line of tall Australian surfer people, so I’d probably be 6’4. Ideally, I’d have the big, triangular tanned figure surfers have, but I wouldn’t have tattoos or piercings.

“I’d have a very minimal wardrobe, you know, black and white and blue – today I’d just be wearing shorts, a t-shirt and Vans.”

Jessica, 24, PR

“My little brother is 19 and people always tell us we look spookily alike. He basically looks like a young Michael Jackson, so you know, fingers crossed I’d look like a young Michael Jackson, pre-nose job.

“The 70s is now in again, so I’d be donning the flares. I’d also work out a lot, but I’d never take ‘gym selfies’. I’d be a man, but not a dick.”

>Michael and Ezzy, 25 and 22, Dancers

Michael (left), Ezzy (right)

Michael: “To start off with, I’d have breasts. I’d have a decent C cup, and a big bum – I’d be a very curvaceous lady. I’d also be showing off my damn fine hips, by wearing high waisted jeans. I’d have a little bit of that eye stuff on, lots of piercings and long braided hair Shit, I’ve given this too much thought.”

Ezzy: “Well I’d still be black, but would I have nice legs, or bum, nice legs or bum? I’d have a fat bum, so I could stare at it – use reflective surfaces everywhere. But with makeup, I don’t know, you see I don’t know how to paint.”

Ellie Williams, 20, Fashion student

 

“I’d have a big, massive beard with long curly hair. I’d also be really skinny and really tall – no muscles at all. But I’d have a bike and ride around on it, without a helmet.

“I’d wear a cool shirt with the top button done up, wear skinny jeans and Doc Martin shoes. I’d love to be a man… for a week. Men have it so easy – you don’t get pregnant, you don’t have the ‘monthly thing’.”

Cedric, 19, Retail

“I’d have long brown hair. But I wouldn’t have much makeup on – I’d like to look more natural. I’d also have a few piercings on the top of my ear, and maybe B cup boobs. I’d love to have a big ass – it’d be amazing. But it wouldn’t suit my body shape.”

Sean, 20, student

“I’d be Whitney Houston. I’d have a massive dark afro, wear a red dress when I’m in the spotlight, boom, done. I’d be rocking those heels too.”

Florencia and George, 19 and 22, Fashion student, Family Business

Florencia (left) George (right)

Florencia: “I’d be a mega beast. I’d be two meters tall, I’d always be on protein shakes. I’d have a few tattoos as well – but I wouldn’t be scary: I’d be a timid beast of a man.”

George: “I’d have long locks of blonde hair, but not these glasses. I’d have a big bum, big boobs and not much makeup at all. I don’t need makeup – my genetics make me naturally beautiful.”

Lucy and Dan, 25 and 33, Printing Company

Lucy (left) Dan (right)

Dan: “I feel I’d be a fairly average woman, in terms of physique. I’d strip down the make up style and be quite conservative in my outfit. People get too carried with their body image, we’re always trying to augment ourselves. Although I’d have a tramp stamp.”

Lucy: “I’d be taller and I’d be working out. I’d want a little bit of arm muscle, but I’d hopefully not really care what I looked like. I’d throw on what clothes I could find in the morning. I’d have nice straight hair – definitely not anything like a top knot.”