Small boobs are great, so why are people getting plastic surgery?

Try a push-up bra if you’re desperate


In 2014, more than 300,000 women and teens underwent a procedure to insert silicone implants into their breasts. That’s a lot of women who felt so bad about their bodies they felt the need to pay to have themselves cut open and have a foreign object put inside them.

Many of us are quite happy being a part of the “itty bitty titty commitee” but many girls can’t help but let the barrage of glamour models, Kardashian-esque figures and lingerie adverts make them feel inadequate. And I don’t blame them, who doesn’t want a body everyone envies?

That said, paying a big chunk of your student loan to have chicken fillets put inside of you really isn’t the logical answer to your obvious self-esteem issues.

We’re girls. If it’s not our boobs, it’s our nose, or hair, or knees, or lips?! Where does it stop? Girls need to accept their body for what it is. You’ll never be a “perfect” image, no one is. Yeah, you might have inherited a big nose from your dad or knobbly knees from your mum, but who gives a shit? Only you. I can guarantee most girls are too busy worrying about their own insecurities to notice yours.

Breast augmentation is also a movement fundamentally led by men. You can’t actively suggest what you’re doing is “empowering” you if you’re investing in a surgery which men created so they could have bigger boobs to ogle. Instead, it’s the definition of disempowerment.

I haven’t even started to mention the health risks you’re putting your body through. It seems girls won’t donate blood because they have a “phobia” of needles but will happily open themselves up in the name of beauty.

Boob jobs aren’t a one-off either, we’re talking an operation every five or more years to change those big bags of saline in you. Katie Price has been opened up so many times now they literally have to insert pig skin into her real skin to help her heal. And don’t say you don’t feel womanly, because boobs don’t define your womanhood. I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t tell Keira Knightley, Kate Hudson or the hundreds of supermodels with flat chests they are any less of a woman than Kim Kardashian because of their less-than-average rack.

Instead of cosmetic surgery, try surrounding yourself with people who don’t make you feel like shit, or maybe have a go at embracing your insecurities. Girls with big boobs can’t wear shirts (which by the way are really in this season), they can’t exercise without strapping their tits down first and they can’t really get away with a stick-on bra. Trust me, small boobs are winning.

If you still want big boobs, a push-up bra is what I’d suggest. Not only is it more financially prudent, it’s also a lot less stupid.