Let the Selly see the Sausage

When 15 single ladies and a host of strapping lads turned up at Joe’s, they had one thing on their mind: bagging a date.

It finally happened. Take Me Out came to Brum. Well, not quite, but Joe’s hosted its own version.

For the uninitiated, the concept is simple. A panel of girls judge a panel on boys on how datable they are, turning off a light if they’re turned off at any stage.

Due to technical difficulties, “no likey no lighty” wasn’t an option, so each girl was given a balloon to pop when boys didn’t tickle their fancies. An excellent – albeit noisy – substitute.

First up was George, the country boy who loves an early night with a crossword puzzle. Sadly for him, all the girls popped their balloons before he could ask his question, which resulted in a sea of waving arms and a heart-wrenching rendition of ‘All By Myself’.

Lad number two was Joe from Nottingham. The hilarious Paddy McGuinness imitator asked the girls, “Joe likes his football – is playing with balls something you like to do?” Joe was left with a choice of Emma, who wanted to get stupid with him at Stupid Tuesdays, or edgy Charlie who’d take him to Propaganda. He went with the latter.

Instead of the tropical island of Fernandos, the pair went to a romantic love booth in Fernanjoes.

Let the Fab see the Fresh!

Next, two charming men serenaded the ladies. First was Ash with ‘Sweet Home Alabama’. Ash asked the girls how they’d get his attention in Fab, with one commenting that she’d do her infamous worm dance, in which she resembeles a slug.

His next choice, Charlotte, said he’d have to wait until Saturday to find out. Evidently not a slug-man, he chose Charlotte, whose confession that she’s a pole dancer might have swung it.

If she seems like a loon, pop that balloon!

The next boy to show off his talents was David. Many balloons were popped when David admitted his FIFA addiction. But after displaying his musical abilities, he bagged a date with Sarah.

Let the Gunnies see the Barrels!

Josh from Oxford got a bit embarrassed when his housemates appeared on the big screen to spill his secrets. They revealed that he rings his mum every night and sleeps with a teddy.

He asks the girls if they have any funny nicknames. Katie answered that he could call her whatever he liked, whilst Yasmin admits that she’s a ‘Rebel Child’. Sadly, Josh couldn’t take Yasmin’s rebellious nature and escorted Katie to Fernanjoes.

Balloon intact and it’s time for the date…

Last was Francis. He plays trombone in a brass band and helps his friends with maths equations. What more could a girl want? On tape, his friends let everyone know that he’s a bit of a party animal.

Francis asked the girls, “If you were a Subway sandwich, what would you be?” Despite Paloma saying she’d be hot and spicy, Francis decided on Emma, and entered Fernanjoes to the tune of ‘Love Shack’.

Francis works out his body, and his mind…

A successful evening, with plenty of new couples and over £300 raised for Barnados.