Try not to panic, but Gordon’s have launched a brand new, PINK gin

This summer has been a bit of a washout, let’s be honest. With practically zero chance of a Pimms and BBQ day (at least not since the freak heatwave which was nearly TWO months ago now), the general feel of the country has been pretty miserable. Until now. Gordon’s has teamed up with Tesco to create a limited edition, brand new, PINK gin. Yes, you heard me. Pink. As if gin could get any better.

Sure, the stuff is basically your worst nightmare when you consider it makes us all psychopaths, it will probably make you cry, almost definitely make you drunk call/text/FaceTime that one ex you never want to see or speak to or breathe the same air as again. There’s also a rumour that it helps you lose weight, that we all desperately cling to even though we know it’s almost definitely not true. Sorry girls. But now it comes in a pink form, and it mixes perfectly with Prosecco, so we can forgive all of those things. They don’t matter anymore.

The “premium pink distilled gin” has a sweeter taste, making it perfect for that summer drink you so badly need to forget your no longer on a beach in Ibiza and you are, in fact, in your living room, staring out at the rain. Because what else do we do in England?

According to the makers, this new drink is said to be “crafted to balance the refreshing taste of Gordon’s with the sweetness of raspberries and strawberries with the tang of redcurrant”. Amazing.

I don’t know about you, but I’m bulk buying this stuff by the gallon before it runs out. I apologise in advance for any psychopathic tendencies that it causes. Well, sorry, but not really sorry. It is pink gin after all.