You may think you’re above this craze but there’s no denying that Tinder works.

With more and more relationships/booty calls blossoming as a result of Tindering, here’s a look at how to use Tinder to woo you (or more likely lose you) a Valentine.

The eye catching photo

Tinder is a shallow system; before you can even talk to potential lovers you have to match with them on an attractiveness level.

If you want to make yourself truely anti-swipe-left-able you’ve got to be unique, intriguing and unforgettable. It helps if you’re a fittie too – or own a really fucking adorable dog:

Game for some red hot scorching loving?

“That’s right, I get all of the bitches”

He’s definitely clenching but damn.

The name pun

So you’ve matched, excellent. But you don’t have an awful lot to work with to deliver that all-important killer opening line.

A cheeky joke based the only thing you know about your match – their name – (God, Tinder is so classy) is sure to get you in their good books because let’s face it; you’re hilarious:

Sooo smooth, David

Make her glad she came…

The witty limerick

If you’re feeling bold, of course there is the opportunity to take this name game a step further.

Everyone loves a naughty limerick so what better way to woo than with some sweet sweet poetry?

Wait, who said poetry was the food of love?

The philosophical life question

Short of some winning ice-breakers? Nothing sparks off a love match like a deep meaningful conversation. Right?

Obscurity is key. Sanity is optional.

Too much for a Sunday morning pal

Preaching like the next Dalai Lama

The downright stupid

Not everyone possesses great insight or intellectual ability. Sure you can call that girl a dumb blonde but you can bet she’s getting laid.

Sometimes simplicity can work wonders. Well, sometimes…

How many times has that one worked for you mate?

I’m just not sure you get how this works

The upfront and honest

You’ve put yourself out there, might as well be honest about your intentions.

So many Tinder matches, so little time, it’s necessary to trim the fat from the true potential. You might do so like this:

#Lewisthelad

Or perhaps the slightly less eloquent…

Yeah, I’m not even going to bother.

Happy Tindering!