What Koreans and Americans can learn from Korean Americans

Probably one of the most interesting things about the children of immigrants is the fact that they have each foot in the door of two different worlds. At the same time, being a Korean American opened my eyes to certain lessons that can be learned in the bridge between Koreans and Americans.

No one has the “better” culture

Americans are too loud, Koreans are too soft-spoken. Americans are too lax, Koreans are too uptight. The former complaints come from my parents, the latter from my American friends. Then there’s me, who can complain about both sides and can’t decide which is more annoying. In the end, neither side can prove itself better. It all depends on perspective.

Variety is a learning experience

My aunt, wearing a Korean hanbok, and my uncle with the roasted pig

As people mingle in the US, lots of different backgrounds will also overlap. My aunt and uncle got married several years ago – however, since they are Korean and Chinese respectively, they wanted to embrace and honor each others’ heritages when introducing the relatives. Hence, we got a roasted pig from the groom’s family as per Chinese tradition.

Pushing comfort zones will open the mind

When my mom got her first job, she was floored by the fact that her boss wanted her to call him by his first name – such informality is unthinkable in Korea. Maybe she’s still not completely used to how weirdly casual Americans can be, but she’s definitely more open-minded than she used to be. She’s still having a hard time believing that I can call my professors by their first names though. (“But they’re your teachers!“)

You don’t have to give up your culture to assimilate

Yup, that’s kimchi and corn side-by-side

Holiday dinners at my house are always a weird mix of ham and kimchi and stuffing and japchae (sweet potato noodles). This is true Asian fusion at its finest, exactly what should be happening when cultures collide. My parents were emphatic about developing my taste for Korean food, despite the fact that we live in America. I now have them to thank for the weird feeling I get if I forgo rice on Christmas day.

It’s fun to be unique

Speaking of food, I always enjoy telling people about the one time I ate sannakji. This is where food gets bizarre: sannakji is raw and still moving octopus. That’s right, it’s still moving when you eat it. I mean yeah, I think it’s creepy too, but it makes for interesting reactions when I talk about it. I get comments about being brave and gutsy (even though I only ate the sannakji to humor my uncle). And to think that this is normal fare for Koreans!

We’re really not all that different

My dad showing my cousin how to play jegichagi, which is the Korean equivalent to hacky sack

One day I was bored and used some yarn to create a Cat’s Cradle, something I played way back in elementary school. When my mom came in and noticed the string, she said “Oh, you know that game?” and made the next move on my Cat’s Cradle. She explained how she played the game as a kid as she held the string out to me, inviting me to take a turn. It’s funny how in the end, we all connect in the most subtle ways, even through something as simple as children’s games. And yes, my mom beat me.

My parents did don the wedding dress and tux, but not before they wore traditional Korean dress to honor Korean wedding tradition

I faced the fact a long time ago that I’ll never be 100% Korean. I’m Korean American, and that means I’m chopstick girl in a fork world (country) and I’m forever at the mercy of Gangnam Style jokes.

At the same time, my hybrid cultural experience taught me about different ways of life, and that stories about eating sannakji make me sound crazy. But hey, it’s a great icebreaker, trust me!