What I learned from three days of silence
I had traditionally looked outside of myself for the happiness I seek
For three days over this past winter break, I sat with myself in silence, along with a group of students at Purdue and people from all over the US, in Boone, North Carolina, for Art of Living’s Silence Program. We came together to rest before the beginning of a new year, to care for and understand ourselves on a deeper level.
Throughout the five-day retreat, we experienced meditation, participated in artistic and communication activities to know ourselves and others better, ultimately walking away with more love for ourselves, each other, and the world around us.
Silence is more fun than you’d think
I’ll admit, sitting in meditation for the majority of four days was difficult. I had pain in my knees, legs and more often than not I chose the option to sit against the wall, which made the pain in my back less noticeable.
During the first meditation, I remember feeling the pain in my body, and wanting someone else to take it away, so that I didn’t have to experience it. I think sometimes we look for people, places, or experiences to take us away from ourselves.
Whether it is a grade, a candy bar, or a relationship, we think that these external influences will make us happy, or at least provide temporary relief. How many of us have bought a food or drink item as a pick-me-up, especially with the stress of exams and term papers?
While doing this every once in a while isn’t bad, I think if our lives are so focused on achievements and external rewards, that we aren’t able to consistently enjoy our days, something’s wrong. While being grateful about what we attain or achieve through success is important, I don’t think success in and of itself will provide fulfillment as an end goal.
Spending three days in silence allowed me to recognize the ways in which I sought happiness outside of myself, and allowed me to redirect this feeling. During the final meditation, as I sat cross-legged for the last time, I was guided to visualize all of the cells in my body as smiling. Focusing on the visualization, I imagined each cell in my body as a vibrant, yellow, happy face. As time continued, my entire body lit up with joy. Any remaining pain melted away with the power of my own love.