The only honest packing list for UC Berkeley

Welcome to Cal, you edgy, sexy new Golden Bear. Every new admit thinks at some point, “what are all the cool kids putting in their luggage?” Well, I’ll tell you one thing: they sure don’t stuff their dufflebags with canned soup and dental floss like their mamas told them to. After interviewing some of the coolest Bears I know, I put together this listicle that definitely beats Stanford’s pathetic excuse for a packing list.

Your own, personal Wi-Fi network 

Yes, they will tell you at orientation that you do not need this. Yes, they will tell you that the university provides free access to the internet via their public Wi-Fi CalVisitor and their private Wi-Fi AirBears. What they don’t tell you is that AirBears will disconnect you 5 minutes before your final paper deadline, and CalVisitor is as flaky as the friends in your group chat.

You need a Wi-Fi network that will treat you right, always be there for you, and not be shared among your best friends and worst enemies. So do yourself a favor, and buy a wireless router.

Bodypaint and game day apparel

Game days are big here, and especially if you’re a freshman, you want to be in the center of all the action. Guys, drop blue and gold paint tubes into your luggage. Go shirtless into the stadium with your buddies, and smear that paint across your chests to spell out “Go Bears!” or “Fuck Stanford”. Gals, invest in Hype & Vice bodysuits/tube tops and skirts. All the girls at the pre-game will be wearing them, so if you want aesthetic Instagram photos, it’s the way to go.

Megaphone and sign-making materials

There are protests at Cal all the time. It’s just a thing that happens, like how tornadoes hit the Mid-West or hurricanes storm Florida. Chances are, if you’re a Berkeley student, you have some strong political beliefs that you really want everyone to know about. And going to Sproul Plaza carrying picket signs and yelling into megaphones is a much more flamboyant way of stirring controversy and inspiring change than an aggressively long Facebook post.

So go out and be heard, my children!

String lights, photo collages, posters, tapestries, rugs, and sports memorabilia 

Un-decorated dorm rooms look like prisons. This is a statement of fact. Paying $1,200 a month to live in a room the size of a shoebox will be infinitely more worth it once you spruce it up to make it more like home. String lights are technically not allowed, but most R.A.s don’t particularly care and will let you have them up so long as you take them down during room inspections.

Bong, pipe, grinder, rolling papers, and lighters

I think you know where I’m going with this one. Berkeley is known as the place where hippies started, and walking along Telegraph Ave. during the day, when all the Bob Marley posters and tie-dye shirts are on full display, will confirm that the neo-hippie movement is in full blaze.

You definitely wouldn’t want to come to school unprepared for 4/20, so find a way to stash your goodies into your suitcase.

Condoms and birth control

The hookup culture is so real in college. You may choose not to have any sex in college, but just in case you change your mind, it’s good to have some protection along with you for the ride. University health insurance makes it very easy to get birth control, just schedule an appointment, and drop by the Tang.

The best part is that your health records are private once you’re over 18, so your parents will never know how you’re spending your weekend nights.

Fake ID (and your real one, too)

When the frats are on probation or you’re feeling like hopping the bars around campus, you don’t want to wait 3 years until you’re actually of age. California IDs have too many security measures, so get yourself a Connecticut or Maine ID. Once you verify that your ID scans, you can go to a liquor store and snag a handle for your floormates or hit up Pappy’s or Kip’s.

And those are all the essentials. You might want to bring clothes, blankets, pens, and notebooks, too, but that’s totally your call. The most important thing is that you have fun exploring all the options Cal has to offer, making the next four years the best four years of your life. Go bears!