There’s nothing wrong with being an introvert

I’m different. And I like it.

I should probably clarify that. When I say I’m different, I mean I’m a textbook introvert. I prefer books to parties. I prefer my two best friends to a teeming list of social media followers I barely know. Class discussions terrify me, but when I start speaking about something I’m passionate about, my raging introverted personality suddenly takes a backseat.

My two closest friends and the ones that get to see my quirky and often vulnerable side

For most of my childhood and teen years, I thought there was something wrong with me. I grew up in a household of extroverts. Most of my closest friends are extroverts. Funny, how that happens in life sometimes -I suppose opposites really do attract. I entered my teen years thinking there was something wrong with me, and that nothing good came out of being an introvert.

After all, it is the extroverts that are popular in school. It is the extroverts that speak up in class and get all the attention from teachers, even if you had the same idea but were too afraid to speak up while you were waiting for the perfect lull in the conversation. It is the extroverts that make new friends most easily when they move schools or join college. It is the extroverts who have the courage to audition for and get the lead roles, both in school plays and often in real life.

Pictured L to R: Introverted daughter, extroverted mother whose skills I have long admired and sometimes envied

As I’ve grown up, I’ve realized that being an introvert is not a curse. It can be a blessing. Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking by Susan Cain helped open my eyes on the issue. Here’s a short quote in which she discusses Rosa Parks:

“I had always imagined Rosa Parks as a stately woman with a bold temperament, someone who could easily stand up to a busload of glowering passengers. But when she died in 2005 at the age of ninety-two, the flood of obituaries recalled her as soft-spoken, sweet, and small in stature. They said she was “timid and shy” but had “the courage of a lion.” They were full of phrases like “radical humility” and “quiet fortitude.”

Inspired by her words, I later did my own research, and found that introverts find themselves sharing the company of Meryl Streep, Mahatma Gandhi, and JK Rowling. These were luminaries in their field that led by passion and ideas and deviated from following the mold of the quintessential charming, charismatic public figure. That’s some enviable company to be in.

As much as social gatherings still grossly intimidate me even in adulthood (yikes!), I no longer put myself down as I enter the threshold of one. Yes, I may not flutter from one group to another, easily making small talk and exchanging Instagram usernames. I might even spend a lot of time attached to either the hip of whomever I came with or the creases of a wall, but that’s okay. When I finally do speak to someone, I will have something substantial to say. Even if I don’t make twenty friends by the end of the ordeal, I will at least have made one solid acquaintance that I will most likely keep in touch with for a while.

So, at the end of the day, do not the world tell you that it is made as a stage for the extroverted actors to shine. There is great value in being introverted, just as there is in being extroverted. If people expect less of you, it means you have fewer obstacles to surpass and barriers to break. You have more room to shine.  If you are different, embrace it. If you are different, make it an asset instead of an impediment. If you are different, don’t try to change yourself.

I am different. And I LOVE it.

My introverted self has no issues with taking umpteen selfies