What your dining hall says about you

We have 13 beautiful dining halls solely for undergraduates here at Yale, but it’s fair to say not every salad bar is created equal. 

Where you choose to socialize in between seminars says a lot about you, so The Tab asked students why they go to certain dining halls. We used our own keen sense of observation to answer the incredibly important question: what does your choice of dining hall say about you?

Berkeley

There’s nothing really fun to say about this one. If you eat here, you like good food, beautiful architecture and a slightly sassy swipe lady. Berkeley is great.

PSA: the author of this article is not in Berkeley

Davenport

You’re in a fraternity or a sorority. Or you’re on the baseball team/secretly hope to see the baseball team.

“They close the kitchen on time, which upsets me.” – Daniel Tovbin ’17

Branford

You don’t mind walking up a flight of stairs to eat. Honestly, that rules out more people than we would care to admit.

“I eat in Branford when I want to be alone, because who eats in Branford?” – Rebecca Wolenski ’16

Calhoun

You have section in WLH or have lost the feeling in your legs after sitting in Bass all day. And there were probably no seats in Berkeley.

“Why do I eat in Calhoun? I don’t, the food sucks. The people are great, though.” – Joel Bervell ’17

Objectively speaking, Calhoun students are the best students

Pierson

You somehow magically have access to the dining hall, or someone in Pierson let you in. You also do not mind eating in what was definitely once a mental hospital.

“I go to Pierson after I’ve been a naughty boy because it feels like I’m eating in heaven.” – Wade Newville ’17

Saybrook

You have obviously forgotten about the Poopetrator. The rest of us have not.

“I eat in Saybrook when I feel like dying because asbestos.” – Sonali Chauhan ’17

Jonathan Edwards

Congratulations! You’re one of the few people who didn’t forget that JE exists. But TBH, you’re probably only there for the library because that place is poppin’.

“Oh right. I forgot about that one.” – Jessie Benedict ’18

This. Is. Luxury

Trumbull

You’re single AF and weeping over a candlelit dinner at Friday date night.

Morse/Stiles

You were probably recruited here and have been known to say, “do you even lift, bro?” non-ironically.

“I literally only go there for the hunnit gang.” – Meg Galloway ’18

Timothy Dwight/Silliman

“So. Far.” – the collective student body

You live in TD or Silliman.

Commons

You’re feeling your look and strut down that aisle like its a fucking catwalk. Best case scenario, you run into the hot lacrosse player you DFMO’d last weekend.

“If I’m wearing a cute outfit I’m not going to waste it on Trumbull, I’m going to Commons.” – Holly Geffs ’18

With a little bit of luck, you’ll catch a glimpse of the British invasion