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It’s been happening since 2013
Clear your calendars for February 15th
And tickets are on sale NOW
Some of us are trying to get a first here
That’s two and a half hours that I’ll never get back
They compared abortion to slavery
Abort your essays and grab a pasty
Poor mental health is an epidemic among students
Move over Canal Mills, I’m drinking £1.50 Jägerbombs tonight
Vote in the most important election of the year
We can’t all be glittery dragon hoes
Bet you still own your Carnage t-shirt
When you try your best but you don’t succeed
If you pick a favourite they’re guaranteed to die next
No, really, someone did say that
It was identical to the feedback from January exams
Remember: gin girls are psycho
Because you can’t write your diss at your kitchen table
Single and ready to cry alone in my room
A down payment on a ten-bedroom house, probably
It all hits the fan so fast