Yo yo!! It’s Alex from Love Island, being your ultimate clubber of the week
Yiioooooo
Annabel MurphyYo yo! It's Alex, the apparent quiet one from Love Island, on clubbers of the week. This week I've been getting trains up and down the country to see my fans. I know you criticised me for going to Poundland, but, seriously guys, that was really materialistic of you.
Montana dumped me, but I'm single and ready to mingle. So look out ladies I'm coming to a tragic hometown club near you.
To confirm, Alex did not write this. However we have found the most classic pictures from his club appearances this week to prove that he does other things besides going to Poundland.
Seven weeks in the villa doesn't protect you from hoverhand
Pretty sure he's asleep
Hey, is that the guy from Love Island? Maybe I'll try get a pic with him. Just need to get a few friends together.
He looks like he's trying to say something
It worked!
All the boys!
Please don't leave me it's a cruel, cruel world
Clinging onto this poor girl for dear life
When the rest of the boys are photo ready but Alex is still deciding on a pose
Guys, I was about to break into a shaka
After a week taking photos with anyone and everyone, there's no such thing as a normal trip to the shops anymore for Alex Beattie
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anotherstephenRemember when she kept posting open love notes on Instagram to him?
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Emily SmithThere have been 59 ghost sightings at one UK uni
MAFS gossip column: Jordan responds to fight scandal and cast knew each other before the show?!
Hayley SoenThe drama really never ends!
Tour buses and family dramas: A brief history of One Direction’s run-ins with the law
Liam Payne has just had his driver’s license suspended
‘You’re scared to step outside’: Two women share their stories of being stalked at uni
This doesn’t only happen to celebrities like Holly Willoughby
Another one! People spot a further editing error in MAFS questioning a staged dinner
Nothing is sacred anymore
Um, the video of Georges squatting has been revealed and you absolutely have to watch it
Ellie RingGive this man all the baguettes
Attention pickpocket! The uni cities where you’re most likely to have your phone stolen
I’m switching back to a Nokia brick after this
Meet Lauren Sintes: The 27-year-old model joining the cast of Made in Chelsea
Of course she’s well connected with most of the cast
Rugby boys and the cleaning rota: Just 19 uni things that are none of my business
The hygiene rating of my fave kebab shop has nothing to do with me!
From secret hookups to cheating: All the biggest bombshells from the Love Is Blind reunion
I’m in shock at all of these
Why do posh people sleep with all their mates? A very serious investigation
The Made in Chelsea mayhem has gone on long enough
‘You’ve made a c*** of yourself’: Shona shares off-screen chat that saw Brad axed from MAFS
‘Bradley said he was behaving like a caged animal’
MAFS UK star Chanita Stephenson calls out the current cast for being a ‘bit too wild!’
She thinks they’re on the show ‘for fun’ and are not ‘focusing on their marriages’
‘Go f**k yourself’: Luke calls out ‘snake’ in MAFS cast who ‘sold’ story of him having a fight
It was revealed today Luke has been removed from the show following a physical fight
Luke has been AXED from Married at First Sight UK following physical fight with Jordan
The incident was caught on camera