Over 8,000 of you voted so now it’s official: Mr Schue is the worst person in Glee
This is the hard scientific proof we needed
I have a confession to make: I’m a big fat liar. A mere week ago I wrote: “We’re so blinded in our hatred for Mr Schue that we don’t talk about how obscenely terrible the rest of the characters are”, and called on the world to vote for who the official worst person in Glee was. Over 8,000 of you voted, and I can confirm that the person who now officially holds that title is (drumroll pleeeeease) – Mr William Schuester himself.
Of the 8,282 votes for the worst person in Glee, Mr Schue received 2,521 – over 30 per cent. Rachel Berry came in second place with 26 per cent of the vote, and Mr Schue’s ex-wife Terri is third-worst, receiving 17 per cent of the votes. Next is Sue, and Brittany is officially the least-worst person in Glee, with less than one per cent of the overall votes.
Here’s the official breakdown of results, which I put more work into than the entire analysis section of my dissertation:
To celebrate, let’s do a full rundown of every single god-awful thing Mr Schue did on Glee. We’ve done something like this before, but if anyone deserves two full Tab articles dedicated to their wrongdoings, it’s Mr Schue.
Here’s every reason Mr Schue is the worst person on Glee:
Everything he did was just unnecessarily sexual
Not a SINGLE thing about Mr Schue was appropriate. He loved watching the Glee kids dry hump the air, and why did he always have to unnecessarily touch them? Did he even have a DBS check??? He should have actually been locked up.
Watch them doing Push It, which Mr Schue made the Glee club perform. The bum-bouncing, the air-humping, all of them gyrating on each other. Like, what part of this is okay?
Whilst we’re on the subject Mr Schue being locked up, he spied on Finn in the shower
Mr Schue recruits Finn to the Glee club when he overhears him singing in the shower and then goes to listen. A naked teenager. Being watched. By his teacher. Yeah, totally fine.
And then BLACKMAILS him
As if watching him shower wasn’t bad enough, Mr Schue blackmails Finn into joining the Glee club by pretending he’s found drugs in his locker. He calls it the “blackest moment of my life”, as if it’s a joke and he hasn’t just committed not one but two actual crimes, in one two-minute scene.
Three words: Like A Virgin
Three couples are all about to attempt to shag for the first time, including Mr Schue and Emma, and they all sing Like A Virgin. Do you not think this triple-performance is more than a bit fucking weird, considering it’s two teachers and then two sets of their own students?
Glee somehow managed to make an iconic Madonna song cringe and just feel downright seedy.
This noise makes me want to claw my own brain out
Nope, no, nein. If I had a time machine and could change any single thing that’s happened in human existence, the thing I would choose to erase would be this sound Mr Schue makes.
His rapping was diabolical
Mr Schue ruined so many actually decent songs this way. Like, my ears are bleeding. Why did he rap so much? God only knows.
Just the entire performance of Gold Digger, including the rapping
Unfortunately this lives rent free in my head, no matter how many times I want to forget its entire existence.
Speaking of this horrible rendition, let’s take a look at some of Mr Schue’s other greatest (read: worst) hits
Exhibit A: Eye-fucking Rachel whilst singing a ballad with her
Exhibit B: Blurred Lines – a deeply questionable song and a deeply questionable Glee cover, complete with some deeply questionable choreography
Exhibit C: Toxic Mr Schue singing Toxic on stage, humping a hat whilst surrounded by children
Exhibit D: Singing Thong Song to Emma, which kiiiiind-of-sort-of slaps (don’t tell anyone I said that) – apart from the fact she’s about to get married to someone else and he’s there singing about thongs to her
Exhibit E (this is the last one I promise, although there could have been many, many more): HE SAYS HE’LL “FIX” EMMA’S OCD BY SINGING COLDPLAY’S “FIX YOU” TO HER. I don’t even need to explain why this is completely and utterly wrong
Mr Schue literally says the Glee kids are all minorities because they’re in the Glee club
Uhhhh, how about no? Some of them are minorities, because of their sexuality, race, or anything else that, you know, ACTUALLY makes someone a minority. But Mr Schue himself, along with several of the Glee kids, are in fact straight white men.
He’s just downright offensive to other cultures
Mr Schue is a Spanish teacher who can’t speak Spanish, and as if that wasn’t bad enough an entire episode is dedicated to him mocking the culture of millions of people with harmful stereotypes.
For more proof, these are the results when you type in ‘Mr Schue’ on YouTube
I went on Incognito so these are accurate. The first autocomplete response is “Mr Schue being a bad teacher”, and the third is “Mr Schue being questionable”. I think that just sums it up really.
He started an acapella group for GROWN MEN
The Acafellas? We should have cancelled him then.
All six seasons of Glee are available on Netflix now. For all the latest Netflix news, drops and memes like The Holy Church of Netflix on Facebook.
Related stories recommended by this writer:
• They should all be in jail, but who is definitively the worst person in Glee? Vote here
• Only a hardcore Gleek could get full marks on this trivia quiz
• I rewatched the first season of Glee and honestly what were these people on?