The ‘pick me’ girl explained: Who is she and how do I know if I’m one?

“I just prefer the company of boys… girls are way too much drama.”

You’ve heard it before – the oh-so-familiar battle cry of pick me girls across the land. We’ve all met the pick me girl/boy time and time again, but recently they’ve been getting a tough time over on TikTok where comments sections are full of people accusing others of being “pick me”. And to be perfectly honest, it’s hard to actually understand exactly what makes a person either a pick me girl or boy.

So, what does it mean to be a pick me girl? Or a pick me boy for that matter? And how do I know if I’m a pick me girl/boy? Today we’re going to get to the bottom of this troublesome phrase that has taken over social media, once and for all.

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What is a pick me girl or boy?

Someone who is “pick me” is someone that deliberately exhibits behaviour that attempts to appease others (most often the opposite sex), whilst acting as if they’re completely unaware that this is what they’re doing… even though they definitely are.

Examples of this trait are pick me girls pretending they’re “not like other girls” by taking part in typically masculine activities or pick me boys saying bad things about themselves to make girls compliment/feel bad for them.

So, to be a “pick me” kind of person is to behave deliberately in a way to make the other sex like you, usually by somewhat cringe and rather obvious means.

Am I a pick me girl or boy?

Glad you asked. It’s impossible to truly say, but here’s a collection of examples in which someone could be considered “pick me”. If you identify with one or more of these, you may well be a pick me girl or boy:

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