What the guild could spend £1298 on

Guild Vice President for Activities and Development Olli Cosentino tweeted this picture earlier this month:

No mis-print…

It’s a breakdown of the printer usage by this years officer team. That’s right. 63786 pages. I mean, I too love printing off Nicolas Cage’s face and sticking it all over my flatmate’s walls, but this surely takes the piss.

Bear in mind that Tab-fan Leander Jones managed 29469 pages in just 399 print jobs…That averages out at 73 Nicolas Cages per job.

I estimate that it would take just about 73 Nicolas Cages to cover the entire back wall of my housemate’s room. ON HIS OWN Leander could do this 399 times. That means that for one month of the year he does it twice every day.

The question we should be left asking ourselves, is why is Leander so obsessed with Nicolas Cage, and should we be getting him help?

The total print cost for the officer team came to a whopping £1298.17. For printing. Perhaps if the University lived by their own ‘Go Green’ policy, we could channel this spending elsewhere.

For example, for £1298, we could buy three of these fantastic chandeliers for Joe’s.

Or treat ourselves to a little R&R with one of these either side of the Mermaid…

We could rent this handsome looking T-rex for 5 days and shove it outside the library to scare off BCU students.

We could buy nearly 400 boxes of delicious chicken with fries and a soft drink from Rooster House.

We could also buy 64 UoB hoodies.

And 519 Jagerbombs from Fab.

What’s most interesting however, is the spread of printing.

Whereas Leander managed nearly half of all printing with his bizarre Nicolas Cage obsession, Home Student’s Officer Joe Sewell managed just £0.61 worth of printing. Barely enough for a Mars Bar. Good on you Joe!

The obvious question is…What is it that Simon Furse, Leander Jones and Alice Swift are printing that requires so much paper? Something out of papier-mâché perhaps?