The Chrystal Macmillan Building has banned flour and eggs

How are we meant to make cakes?

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The School of Social and Political Science has banned flour and eggs from the Chrystal Macmillan building.

In an effort to avoid a sticky situation, the department decided to ban the basic culinary ingredients from the Central building.

The decision was made to ensure that the long-standing end of exam ritual of throwing eggs and flour did not take place on the campus.

The Chrystal Macmillan building, which has recently undergone a flashy refurbishment, today was covered in signs telling students that there was to be “NO EGGS” and “NO FLOUR”, accompanied by a noticeably passive aggressive message thanking students “for celebrating the end of exams without throwing eggs and flour”.

The decision has left many Edinburgh students bemused.

4th year Leila said that it was another example of the university trying to “suck the fun out of all university life”.

“I wouldn’t be surprised if they’d created a ‘safe egg and flour throwing space'”

While 2nd year Jack thought it was a slippery slope:

“What’s next, we can’t bring sugar and baking soda?”