The Tab’s guide to what’s happening in Edinburgh: Week One

Freshers week may be over, but that doesn’t mean the party has to stop.

Seeing as week one is made up of introductory lectures, pt meetings and tutorials – all of which you can do on under three hours sleep – we’re giving you permission to recreate the last week, only this time without the shitty fresher events.

Whether you’re into Big Cheese or Biggie Smalls, rest assured there’ll be something going on for you.

Tuesday

KANYE FEST ’17

When: Tuesday 19th, 23.30-3.00

Where: The Liquid Rooms

What they say: “Kanye Fest is a unique and original idea that was born from our love Kanye music. It was an absolute smash last year with just over 1000 people in! We have really good drinks prices starting at £1 and tickets are £6/7 with 70% Yeezy going all night long!

“We are currently running a competition for 7 people to win a free limousine hire, which runs by picking them up from flat or halls, has a quick tour of the city with complimentary champagne included and drops them off at Liquid Rooms to start their night in style.”

What we say: As one of the most popular events of the year, you can’t really go wrong with Kanye Fest. Most of us love Kanye like Kanye loves Kanye, and even if you don’t, you’ll at least vaguely know the words to Gold Digger. Who knows, you might even find yourself a Kim.

££££: Early bird is sold out, so tickets are up to £6.

Wednesday

A History of UK Pirate Radio

When: Wednesday 20th, 23.00-3.00

Where: Loco Kamanchi, La Belle Angele

What they say: “Cast yourself back to a time when stations were at risk from the Police and rival stations battling to pledge allegiance to a viciously talented roster of MCs and selectors…

“With free entry till 11.30pm, Wednesday night sees Loco Kamanchi bringing the best from Jungle to UK Garage and Bass to Grime!”

What we say: It was Bongos’ Wednesday night last year, but Loco Kamanchi has moved on to La Belle, and at the same time, upped the ante. For their UK Pirate Radio night, think So Solid Crew, Roll Deep and Nasty Crew – and if you’re not familiar and get dragged along, prepare yourself for an education.

££££: free before 23.30, £5 after, £4 guestlist until 12.15am.

The Tab’s Inaugural Pub Crawl

When: Wednesday 20th, 20.00-3.00

Where: Starts at Revolution, then Tron, Finnegans, Three Sisters and Pilgrim.

What we say: We couldn’t resist the temptation to include a compulsory event on this list. If you’re at all interested in writing for us, come along.

££££: Free.

Thursday

Funktion IV

When: Thursday 21st, 23.00-3.00

Where: The Caves

What they say: “Funktion returns this Thursday for another night of reckless rhythms and cobbly chaos at The Caves.

“This will be the first of four nights this year, and we have big plans for the upcoming events. Watch this space.”

What we say: There’s a reason why Funktion is almost always sold out, and this time they’re promising it to be bigger and better than ever before. Their mix of house, disco and funk will be sure to brighten up your September, and, teaming up with a venue like the Caves, makes it one of the most unique events in the Edi calendar. Not one to miss.

££££: Sold Out. Better luck next time.

Rascals’ 1st Birthday 

When: Thursday 21st, 22:30-3:00

Where: Rascals, Bourbon

What they say: “Rascals Thursday’s, Edinburgh university’s biggest Thursday night at Bourbon turns 1 this week. With unique decor, party hats and cake…lots of cake. It is sure to be one party not to miss. Last weeks freshers week was some turn out but they say this is one not to be missed. Get down early and don’t miss out on Rascals first birthday.”

What we say: Rascals was arguably the biggest student night to come out of 2016/17, and people are still queuing religiously each week to get in. Luckily, for their birthday celebrations they’re opening the doors early, and with a copious amount of free cake to add to their usual £1 drinks, shots and RnB, you can’t go wrong.

££££: £5 guestlist / £6 after 12

Friday

Big Cheese Welcome Back Weekender

When: Friday 22nd, 21.00/21.30-3.00

Where: Potterrow

What they say: “Next week is the first one [weekender] and its a beach theme. There’s a face book event page as well as our website so keep an eye on those for updates. We’ll be doing more through the year so watch out for those too!”

What we say: If you’re basic enough to shamelessly attend a Big Cheese Weekender while also still buzzing about Love Island, then this event is right up your street.

Jamie and Camilla are appearing Friday, while Saturday sees Jess and Georgia hit the VK’s. We’re not sure what they’ll actually be doing, but lets hope they stay long enough for someone to get a vid of Jess singing Angels before falling down the spiral stairs. It’s only tradition.

££££: £3 before 11/£4 after, add £1 if you’re not a student or you’re bringing your mum.

Crème Fresh: Chicago to Detroit w/ Wrisk 

When: Friday 22nd, 11.00-3.00

Where: The Mash House

What they say: “We’re celebrating music from the cities of Chicago and Detroit with our good friend Wrisk of Overground fame. Expect classics and current favourites.”

What we say: As the coolest thing to come out of Fresh Air, Crème Fresh are back, this time appearing at Mash House. As they’re attempting to navigate through as many genres as possible in one night, including Motown, Ghetto Tech, and Electro, there’s sure to be something for everyone.

££££: Free before 12, £5 after.

Secret Fridays Presents Alex Mytton!

When: Friday 22nd, 20.30-3.00

Where: Secret Fridays, Silk

What they say: “You can definitely expect a messy night with majority of drinks £1, £1.50 vodka mixers, Alex is doing a DJ set then has a table in VIP, which is open to all VIP users.

“Great music, cheap drinks, inflatables, party decor and a all round fun night partying with Alex Mytton himself.”

What we say: As the newest night at Silk, Secret Fridays are actually allowing Alex Mytton to perform a DJ set. If you’re at all a fan of Made in Chelsea, this will only add to what’s usually a solid night at Silk, and if not, you probably wont notice the difference.

££££: Depends on the level of your love for MIC as to how expensive you think tickets are: £7 to get in may seem steep, but you can’t say £11.25 for VIP to meet the biggest fuckboy in Chelsea isn’t cheap.

Saturday

Fly Open Air and afterparties

When: Saturday 23rd, 12.00-23.00 / 23.00-3.00

Where: Princes Street Gardens / Sneaky Petes / Bourbon

What they say: “It’s our third fly open air and all three have sold out so we’re really excited for this weekend… especially to be back partying under the castle in princes street gardens…

“If you haven’t got a ticket there are still some left for the afterparties which are always class as all the staff from the festival get to knock off and join the carry on plus most of the acts that play the festival hop on the decks too!”

What we say: If you didn’t manage to nab a ticket for Fly fest, the afterparties are definitely the next best option. With George Fitzgerald and Theo Kottis playing at Bourbon and surprise guests at Sneaky Petes, you can at least tell yourself it beats standing in the rain in Princes Street Gardens.

££££: The actual festival itself is sold out, but Bourbon tickets are £11.30 with the booking fee, and Sneakys are the same.

Yeezy Listening – Kanye West Night

When: Saturday 23rd, 23.00-3.00

Where: The Wee Red Bar

What they say: “What to expect? Everything from his biggest hits from his early days, to the more abrasive tracks from Yeezus onwards, collaborations, tracks he’s featured on, produced or co-written. Old classics that he’s sampled will also be getting a spin. In a word it will be lit!”

What we say: If you’re not Kanye-d out from Kanye Fest, Yeezy Listening may be the best way to quench your Kanye thirst. Or, if you’d prefer something slightly more lowkey than the 1000-strong Liquid Rooms night, but still want your yearly dose of Yeezy, this is a perfect alternative.

££££: Early bird is sold out, so tickets are £6.