Cluster Bums

The University of Leeds has an abundance of computer terminals at the disposal of staff, students and visitors alike. Hurrah indeed!

Thankfully, computer clusters serve as a convenient tool for when needing to research that extra bit of material for an impending seminar or to make last minute adjustments to an essay nearing imminent submission.

Yet alas, it is absolutely mind bogglingly frustrating to find computer terminals and cluster rooms polluted with a minority of selfish, procrastinating half-wits dribbling over their latest Facebook fix while all you want to do- shock!- is check up on a little Nuclear Proliferation for your latest assignment.

What is astonishing, though, is the incredulous look you receive when you ask Mr or Mrs ‘Facebook addict’ if you could kindly use the computer terminal for purposes other than dribbling over some ex-roommates holiday snaps from Laos.

Does it not cross the mind of these lunatics that actually people want to use the facilities for – shock- productive, academic purposes? I suspect not.

To provide evidence towards my suspicions last semester, sitting next to a girl in one of the larger computer clusters, it was obvious she had a lot of work on as she browsed through piles of pictures of someone’s debauched night out on Facebook. They could have been her photos, but everyone was so orange in the snaps it was hard to tell.

Then, she spoke to me, in the most disinterested tone conceivable asking for the time. WHY? It’s not as if she was polishing her essay’s bibliography before afternoon submission. Now, either you must be as thick as the spawn of JLS fan or have a hole in the head the size of Man Utd’s trophy cabinet to not know where to find the time on Windows powered P.C. This proves my point: these people are not interested in anything unless it can be poked or uploaded.

Clearly, it’s frustrating and just not on. Get off Facebook, make room for persons needing to use the PC’s for more legitimate aims and do something useful with your time.

The advice is simple, if you feel the need to login and check up on your best friend’s next door neighbour status, or update how many times you have fiddled with your testicles, fine, grab your coat, find the exit and. Toddle off home and don’t clog up University computer terminals with your irritatingly boorish dribble.