10 Types of People You’ll Find at Canal Mills

1. The Gurner

Can be spotted with a bottle of water on the dance floor. His jaw can be spotted elsewhere.

2. Bindi Bitch

Stick a jewel, a sticker, a raisin on your forehead and you’re in with the bindi bitches. They will more than likely slide down your face when you sweat out. Just add more. Very edgy.

3. Not so A-ok guy

Among the wide eyed two steppers, there is zombie like figure making his way through the crowd. Slowly.

4. The Tag Along

That housemate who has taken a night off from Mixtape or the pub, and has bought an overpriced ticket for a DJ he’s never heard of.

5. Wrigley’s Wonder Woman

The girl with all the gum who is chewing vigorously. She’s a savior to the surfeit of gurned students.

6. The Shuffler

This type of person might not know what is going on or who is currently DJing, but will dutifully ‘crip walk’ on the spot, to the bar, and into you.

7. The Latecomer

Stays until the bitter end because he’s dropped his pill a little too late.  As the saying goes, what goes up must come down, even if it’s not ’til 7 am…

8. The Eskimo

There’s a cloakroom but they won’t use it –  taking off their edgy sheepskin coat or oversized denim jacket is just not an option. Don’t even mention the beanie.

9. The far gone fourth year

Probably outgrown the days of dabbing and dancing in a circle, the fourth year pursues the night, secretly wishing they were watching Poirot with a decaf tea.

10. The Glitter Galz

Just like a modern day Hansel and Gretel, this group of galz leave a trail of glitter (fallen from their cheeks) from canal mills to their home, in the presumption they’ll be far too gone to remember their way back.

What club do you want to see next? Let us know in the comments!