We created a game of ‘Isolation Shot Bingo’ so you can drown your quarantine sorrows

Safe to say the UK’s new social distancing policy and closing pubs and clubs might be doing bits for our bladders, but it is NOT doing bits for our social lives. In fact, despite basically being in a natural mode of quarantine before the COVID-19 pandemic, we’ve never been so bored.

With uni’s closing their doors and our part time jobs on hold, it looks like we’re gonna be stuck inside for a while. So, as any true Brit does in a crisis, we turn to drink – everyone knows there’s nothing a good alcoholic beverage and a bourbon biscuit can’t sort. So whilst it’s not quite tinnies on Woodhouse Moor, it’s the best we can do.

This little game of shot bingo is guaranteed to get you all absolutely twatted this quarantine, so grab your spirit of choice and get playing:

1. Take a shot every time someone’s mum posts that fake news on Facebook about holding your breath for 10 seconds

No, Karen, holding your breath will not reveal if you have the virus, it’ll just make you look like a twat.

2. Take a shot every time you lose a soldier (aka someone goes back home from uni)

Suddenly SnapMaps is revealing everyone’s true home county dwellings.

Tories, reveal yourselves

3. Take a shot every time you get really really excited about lunch

We’ve been thinking about this pesto pasta since 7pm last night.

4. Take a shot every time you complete a true crime documentary series on Netflix

This is at least four shots a day already.

Dont f**k with Cats is WILD

5. Take a shot every time someone sings “dancing queen, young and sweet, stuck in quarantiiiiine”

The only Covid-19 bop you need.

6. Take a shot every time someone leaves an online seminar

The AUDACITY.

Tbf you’ve already forgotten to go to most of yours.

7. Take a shot every time you see something about Virtual Fruity

Tbf a boogie with the cat sounds like a pretty good motive at this point.

8. Take a shot every time you Google “does an itchy nose mean I have coronavirus??” or any equivalent medical query

Hopefully the vodka shots will detract from the perpetual paranoia.

Who needs the NHS when you’ve got Buzzfeed?

9. Take a shot every time you start a home workout and give up after two minutes

No, a tin of chopped tomatoes won’t suffice for your isolation weight training program.

10. Take a shot every time someone stares at you suspiciously because you coughed

I promise I just choked on my water!!

This.

11. Take a shot every time someone puts “I know its not their fault but uni should deffo extend deadlines till September” in the group chat

This one should get you pretty steaming.

12. Take a shot every time you have a shower

Is any one else showering like 14 times a day??!!

13. Take a shot every time you have a drink with your parents

If you’re at home, obvs. If not, take a shot for each of your remaining housemates.

We love a two generation drinking party

14. Take a shot every time you see a LeedsFess about COVID-19

Will you lot shut up about it already.

15. Take a shot every time you see Boris Johnson on the telly

Bonus shot if he addresses Laura Kuenssberg by her first name.

Fighting the virus with his bare fists. A hero.

16. Take a shot every time you eat something from a tin

Tinned peaches never tasted so good.

17. Take a shot every time the 24hr Sainos STILL doesn’t have any pasta sauce 🙁

But we’re so bored of toast :(((

18. Take a shot every time you see a quarantine orange or other drawing challenge on insta stories

Where did they come from??

‘It’s orange time’

19. Take a shot every time you get back into bed

Can’t afford to be heating up the house 24/7 so my bed it is.

20. Take a shot every time you think about starting an obscure hobby

‘I’ve always wanted to do macrame, maybe I’ll order a kit off amazon…’

21. Take a shot every time you rewatch an episode of a British masterpiece

Think absolute classics like Gavin & Stacey, Inbetweeners, Fresh Meat, Friday Night Dinner, etc.

22. Take a shot every time you quote from an aforementioned British masterpiece

Those “inconsiderate arseholes” just took the last pack of loo roll in Morrisons!!

23. Take a shot every time you complete another round of “isolation masturbation”

No, we don’t believe all those tissues are for your runny nose, you detty pig.

24. Take a shot every time you actively notice you’re thinking something you’ve never thought before

You’re either becoming Einstein or a fucking idiot. We’re not sure which.

The question on everybody’s lips

25. Take a shot every time you wish you could go to RPP with your mates

Honestly the biggest travesty of this whole self-isolation thing.

Take a shot to the good times :(((

26. Take a shot every time you sing “Happy Birthday” whilst washing your hands

Just an excuse to wash your hands every ten minutes then?

27. Take a shot every time you finish reading a Tab article

GOT YA xox

So, with that we hope you are all appropriately plastered, ready to snuggle on the sofa in your PJs, watch yet another episode of something pointless on Netflix, and wait for the whole thing to blow over.

Pass us the bottle opener.