The ASSL Seating Guide

We’re entering term-time and the ASSL is alive as per. We went hard in our post-exam blow-out, but now it’s time to sit in the library and um… work?

The Ground Floor

No lectures for me

The foodies and boozies lie here. Hanging on the colourful chairs there’s the comfort of nearby coffee, vending machines and little fear of missing that lecture. There’s no need to enter the outside world, or suffer the glares of intense studiers if you do fancy a little chat or nibble.

You can have a little spin on a chair, chat with your mates, twiddle your thumbs, whatever you wish. If you want to stay in the foetal position the Lash left you in last night, no one is going to stop you.

The Lobby

The entrance floor: full of dynamics if you pick the right seat. You can balance between the cheeky glance of who comes in and out of the library and actually doing some work – what you came here to do.

The computers are specifically reserved for the morning early birds before their 10am. After that, they are free game. With animals frantically printing between lecturers and lunch, post-grads who have accepted the wildlife of the ASSL and that poor lad who gets frustrated at every key type. These are quick use comps.

The red chairs are everyone’s favourite place to kill time and play a game gossiping last night’s antics, basically trying to spread anonymous details to the largest group of people before YikYak. And yes, everyone on the desks surrounding is listening. Becky chundered on Steve’s shoes and then blew him. We don’t know who Becky is, but unlucky Steve.

If you’re not up for the gossip stories then you can hide behind the big security glass like a boss man. Around the best kept books you feel extra studious. These are prime spots and are longed for by 1pm late comers as they nosey up the stairs. Get there early and hold your ground.

The Law Floor

Ironically called the “Law Floor” you will never find a lawyer in here. If you do catch a pair, they’re scrapping over the last textbook as deadline day swiftly approaches, because why would you waste money on something you’ll only use two pages from? Let’s be serious.

The only reason to enter is on the desperate search for a seat. You haven’t cleared the Domino’s out of bed, the kitchen stinks of last night’s party and everywhere is already taken. Honestly, it’s a nice place to study. In the heart of the library it’s not too hot not too cold and you haven’t sweated up the extra flight of stairs.

The Top Floor

Full of unread literary critics, the top floor is the quietest of all. With people sweltering over the last paragraphs of their dissertations this is not the place to be making noise. Despite the squeaky floors, it is your fault if you step on one so don’t you dare. With the pink haired librarian patrolling the aisles the rooms silence is only broken with the shallow echo of keyboards tap tap tapping around the four brick walls.

At least it has a nice view if you do fancy a quick daydream.