The types of students you meet on Valentine’s Day

The season of love is finally upon us and, whether you like it or not, you will fit into a stereotypical, very cringe-worthy category. From the people endlessly swiping on Tinder, to the ones brave enough to go on a first date on Valentine’s, or the loved-up couples who are posting their millionth picture- we get it, you’re happy. So which category do you belong in?

The F Boy

North Face Puffer, battered Air Force Ones, a questionable haircut, and definitely part of some sort of Cardiff uni sports team. Do any of these describe you? Unfortunately for you, you may suffer from what is known as being a fuckboy. Symptoms for this include having a group chat that breaks the rules of the Geneva Convention, and your personality really just comes down to a gullet and a mullet. We’re praying for a speedy recovery.

Maybe we’re just hating from outside the club- you do you man.

The ‘What are we?’

You’ve been on a handful of dates and are sleeping together, but now it’s the 14th…what do you do now? Do you get each other presents? What’s something that’s sweet but not that much of a big deal? What about dinner? Maybe you can buy one of those Tesco cupcakes to share. A low key-brunch at The Early Bird? Nothing?

If this rings a bell, just you wait. You are perpetually stuck in a circle of booty calls and awkward smiles, glancing away when you see them for the second time that day outside Lidl. We won’t blame you if that sounds familiar. Good luck with the last minute plan of Netflix and Chill (and maybe some chocolates?).

The ‘Newly Single’

You just broke up with your high-school sweetheart and now you’re single for the first time on Valentine’s day. So it’s time to load up Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, OkCupid, and possibly Facebook Dating. You’re feeling good- you’ve got on a cute outfit and you’re determined to show everyone that you are JUST FINE being alone.

Grab the gin, put on a brave face, and make your way to Live Lounge for a night to remember. Or, more likely, remembering all the loved up couples holding hands on the walk out. Who made this day legal?

The single by choice or single by ‘my’ choice

You’re a Veteran Single. Valentine’s Day is just Monday to you; you’ve got to go to work, get going with your coursework reading and pretend the ghosting doesn’t hurt. If one more person un-matches you you are going to sign up for Naked Attraction.

Your mum still sends you a Valentine’s card each year… so that’s something. But don’t worry; the chocolates will be on sale on the 15th and that is something to look forward to. Maybe a little treat to Big Tesco? Besides, think of all the money you save from spending it on someone else? If you feel lonely, a six pack (of donuts) is the answer.

2-4-1 cocktails all for yourself, what more can you ask for?

The ‘Newlyweds’

Did someone say honeymoon phase? Or endless Insta stories, claiming this is a love like no other? You’ve been together a matter of months but go ahead, book that trip to Paris, what could possibly go wrong? You’ve finally found your fifth “soulmate” of the year.

You will spend half your loan spoiling your other half, because of course, they’re worth it. A cute bowling date at Play At Pins, dinner at Miller and Carter followed with cocktails at The Alchemist sounds like a great idea until you check your bank account the next morning. Maybe it’s time for a part-time job.

Endless hugs and love

The ‘Married Couple’

You’ve been together since the start of Uni and are still going strong. You’re friends refer to you guys as mum and dad which you first hated but now find weirdly comforting. After all, the two of you are the ones who walk them back after a night out at YOLO or Juice. Valentine’s Day is just like a birthday; it’s neither depressing nor stifling. You have been the Newlyweds before and are now looking forward to either a cute low-key dinner at your favourite restaurant on City Road or a romantic night in. Either way, we are SO happy for you and your cute ‘Then Vs Now’ insta posts.

Whether you are celebrating this Valentine’s Day with a partner, chilling with friends or just enjoying some time to yourself, remember to embrace the cringeyness of the day! A little bit of in-your-faceness never hurt anyone- so give your mates a bouquet! Serenade your housemates! This is the perfect time of year for embarrassing displays of affection.

Recommended articles by this writer:

• Things you need to understand if you’re an English fan living in Wales 

• Face coverings and Covid pass rules are to be scrapped this month in Wales

• Juice is hoping you’re their Valentine this V-day