Nott so bad after all: We’re top for graduate employers

The UK’s leading employers have made Nottingham students their number one target for graduate recruitment.

According to a study from High Fliers Research, employers like Goldman Sachs and Google have been licking their lips at the prospect of recruiting graduates from Nottingham, making it the most targeted university in 2013-14.

Laughably, Cambridge finished a pitiful third, while Oxford have presumably lost all of their hard-earned credibility after coming in at fourth.

“We finally beat Oxbridge at something!”

With exam period upon us, the news is bound to cause a ripple of unrestrained joy to spread through Hallward and give that much-needed lift to panicked second and third years.

The report was based upon studies from December 2013, where High Fliers conducted research with the UK’s 100 leading graduate employers, including giants such as PwC, BP, HSBC, IBM and presumably plenty of other impressive-sounding acronyms.

Tom Jenkin, a currently employed graduate and friend of The Tab, insightfully said: “It’s no surprise, really. We’re a clever bunch and we’re way better looking than most universities.”

“Don’t cry, after exams are finished you may get momentarily considered by PwC!”

Dr Paul Greatrix, Registrar, said: “This is terrific news for our students and alumni — it confirms that The University of Nottingham is delivering the global graduates that employers are looking for.

“It reflects continuing investment in the student experience at Nottingham, and the focus we have on providing the best possible support for students as they prepare for a challenging job market. It’s also a testament to the fantastic work of our academic staff and professional services, and the calibre of our students.”