Shave Yourself the Hassle

That most wonderful time of the year has arrived. Ladies, prepare to be dazzled. Gentlemen, prepare to be upstaged. Movember is back! Yes, that’s right, once again our manliest men will be growing mildly silly facial hair, and it’s all for a good cause. What a great idea.

Except, as this annual phenomenon begins to fill my facebook feed once again, I can’t help but get the overwhelming feeling that it’s all a big load of bollocks.

Is it just me, or is this perhaps the tamest charity event ever? I feel like the emperor’s swanning about naked and everyone else is raving about his hilarious and quirky new suit.

There’s this pretty strong idea in Cambridge that in order to raise money for charity you have to earn it. It doesn’t matter how good the cause is, if you’ve not got yourself lost in a field before cycling to an airport, sweet-talking yourself onto a plane and then jumping out of it, frankly you’re not trying hard enough.

Now, this isn’t something I’m entirely comfortable with – I prefer to think that I’d give to charity because of the worthiness of the cause, not because my mate James did something I could never do when he climbed Kilimanjaro. But maybe that’s a losing battle. It seems to be widely accepted wisdom that to raise some money you have to something that’s difficult, brave or stupid.

Your growing a moustache is none of these things. What you’ve essentially done is not shave a part of your face for a month. No really, read that again. You’ve not shaved a part of your face for a month. Am I seriously donating money for you to save two mundane minutes from your daily routine?

I’m all for raising money for charity, and this particular cause is as worthwhile as almost any other. For those of you who don’t know (and let’s face it, despite the omnipresence of crumb catchers, most people don’t) Movember is about raising awareness and money for men’s health issues, particularly testicular and prostate cancer.

From this point of view I couldn’t be more behind it. And if it works, that’s fantastic. Any life saved or improved, any research backed and any relatives looked after make me grateful for the fantastic work of all kinds of charities.

But come on people, do something a bit more interesting. Or just campaign for the cause without pretending that what you’re doing is what I’m ‘paying’ for, or that this will be some kind of hardship.

I’m sure someone will point out that the moustache is all about a visual reminder of men’s health. But it’s not. It’s a bit of facial hair, which is generally considered to look stupid. Most people who see you will either think you’re a prick, or that you’re cool, but they probably won’t immediately think about getting their prostate checked. The cause you’re supporting is a great one, but please, can’t we all be a bit more imaginative?