Daily Mail is shocked to see Cambridge students outside

Journalists were shocked and appalled when they realised that students of Cambridge have lives outside of the library.

They prowled about, huge cameras in hand, on the fringes of Jesus Green, nabbing pictures of students doing nothing even vaguely spectacular.

OMG look at those normal students doing normal student things!!!!!!

I was there all day wondering about with my camera – a fresher who thought that Caesarian Sunday was going to be the debauched alcoholic nightmare of the Mail Online, but I quickly realised that it was just a bunch of students drinking outside on a slightly drizzly/sunny English summer day…

Sunny day

Drizzly day – the photo opportunities were endless!

Reach for the stars…

Even the police were having fun.

Disgusting impersonation of a police officer

Maybe even too much fun…

*Cue 80s porn music*

TWERK TEAM

They even made one arrest…

Caj gettin’ arrested

We were promised by our scary colleges’ ‘don’t go to Jesus Green’ emails that there would be a ‘strong police presence’. I spotted six…

They’re that little speck of fluorescent green in the distance……

Yep them…

The drinking society brigade were also out in force…

So lashed.

Looks like he’s PACking…

DO YOU HEAR THE PEOPLE SING

And some of them were really… really drunk.

Alcohol oozing from every pore

So expect to see lots of this…

Aren’t those for gardening…?

This…

Yaaaah this is a Prada whip

And plenty of this…

Double rainbowwwwww

From them…

Back to Daily Mail HQ… (I spoke to them… They weren’t from the Daily Mail, they were actually very nice)

Over the next couple of days (even though there’s a General Election and a new Royal Baby).

So to conclude – students like alcohol, sometimes look like tits, and the Mail will make a story out of LITERALLY anything. Tab out.