Cambridge-related song parodies we didn’t have the budget to make

Here at The Tab we like to think outside the box. When we can’t think outside the box, we like to copy someone else thinking outside the box.

When we can’t be arsed to actually copy someone else, we write it in an article for you and pass it off as journalism.

After watching Eton Style, the remix of Gangnam style from our toff brothers down in Windsor, we decided to make our own. Then we decided it was too hard. Here’s what we would have done:

Bruno Mars: “Upgown Funk”

Stop

Wait a minute

Think my pidge got an essay in it

Have a read, take a look

Hugo! Get the books!

Check the UL, Faculty, finally the college

When we show up, we gon’ show our

Supervisor a distinct lack of knowledge.

R Kelly: “Tuition Remix”

It’s the remix to tuition

White privilege edition

We walk straight into jobs

While you grads are still fishing

Sipping port at a bop

Thinking so what if I flop

Daddy works in the city

He’ll just give me a job

Spice Girls: “When 2:2 become 2:1”

By candle light I read forever

A dream of a degree together

Say you believe it, say you believe it

Free your mind of doubt and danger

Your family probably won’t estrange you

We can achieve it, we can achieve it

Come a little bit closer baby, study on, study on

‘Cause tonight is the night when 2:2 become 2:1

I need a 2:1 like I’ve never 1 before

(wanna pass uni baby)

I failed last year, now I’m back for more

(wanna pass uni baby)

Set your flashcards free, it’s the only way to be

N.W.A: “Straight Outta Homerton”

Straight outta Homerton, crazy motherfucker reading education

From the college near Cambridge station

You can catch me, always rolling

To the arcades when I been bowling,

Don’t fuck with the Homerton abode

Or let us catch you out on Hills road,

We run the CB2 postcode

If you have the time, energy, resources and lack of social life required to make any of the above please feel free.

We can’t guarantee that it will go viral, but it’ll be posted on The Tab which is pretty much the same thing.