Quarandreams: Cambridge students share their weird lockdown dreams

Apparently lots of us have been having vivid and weird dreams during lockdown.  I was sure Cambridge students would be no different, given the words that spring to mind when I think ‘Cambridge students’ are ‘vivid’ and ‘weird’. So I asked for people’s wackiest, weirdest and most out-there dreams, and you guys did not disappoint. Some of these could honestly be made into films, although a common theme seems to be starting out with a coherent plot and leaping off the rails by the end.

Caitlin, 3^rd Year:

“I was a speaker for the opposition in a debate at the Cambridge Union entitled ‘This house regrets the end of imperialism in India’. I had just finished an essay on imperialism so I felt like I had a lot of facts I could pull out, but was otherwise under-prepared.

“I got to the Union which had about five floors of gallery seating and I ended up sitting right at the top. I was quite concerned that I wouldn’t make it down to the floor in time when they called my name to speak and I would have to forfeit my turn, which I don’t think is a real thing.

“A guy from a class I am in, Magnus Crow, was also there, speaking for the proposition (this is a fake name, but I tried to match the level his real name is on). He was very smug about how good he was going to be and I was really annoyed because his speech was going to be pro-imperialism so obviously I wanted him to do badly (by the way, I have no reason to believe that the real Magnus Crow is either smug or pro-empire).

“As I was awaiting my turn to speak I started to feel dizzy from how high up we were, and by the time it was Magnus Crow’s turn I could hardly see. Through my blurred vision I discovered the source of his smugness- he had prepared a big pro-imperial musical number with backup dancers. My name was called so I needed to head down, but I could barely see.

“Somehow I got down the spiral staircase, but as soon as I reached the dispatch box I collapsed onto my back in a star shape and heard a huge gasp from the five floors of audience before I passed out. When I recovered everybody was made to stand up and clap me but Magnus Crow refused to stand and my part one DoS kicked him out of the Cambridge Union for impertinence, although Magnus’ name was now David. And then I woke up so I don’t know how my speech went.”

Marina, 2^nd Year

“I dreamt that I was watching a documentary about a woman who hunted bears, and she did it a lot and these bears were super violent and kinda looked possessed (like they had one of them tied to a tree and it jumped down from the tree and almost killed someone from her team). And I was wondering why this woman was hunting bears so often when it was so dangerous, but suddenly I was the woman and the dream turned even weirder.

“Turns out she was being haunted by what my brain decided to call a “presence”, so basically like a ghost that bothered her (who now was me) unless she hunted bears.

“I also dreamt there was a demon hunter living in my hall in college and I became part of his team during first year but then I got super scared about it and decided to quit that lifestyle, and then my parents were staying in my hall in college too ’cause it now was a hotel”.

 Ana, 3^rd Year

“I was wanted for murder but it was unfair because it had been in self-defence and the government was corrupt and trying to pin a murder spree on me and I was in hiding back in my old school, except it was kind of a blend of school and Cambridge colleges especially Lucy Cav. The government sent armed police and also assassins to get me, and my friends had to try to pretend to be on the police’s side and mislead them while I found a place to hide.

“One friend fucked it up and I had to hide on a roof. From there I saw one of the assassins arming a sniper (the assassin was on top of the canteen but it had a really tall gothic tower on top of it). He could see me and I could see him and he tried to shoot me so I did some quite impressive dodging and ended up inside the library block in a big hall with a lot of glass which meant he could still shoot at me. One of the bullets nearly hit and went whizzing past my ear, I actually felt it graze my shoulder (close call!).

“Anyway I barrel rolled toward one of the stairways and went down them, bumping into two boys from my year on the way. One was like ‘aren’t you wanted for murder lol’ and I was like ‘lol what no not me’ and gave the other a nod and he gave me a nod because he definitely knew the truth but wasn’t saying anything.

“I went downstairs into the library and pushed past all the librarians to get to Mrs C, who was reading with a year 7 in the fiction library. Mrs C was actually the meanest head librarian back in the day but in my dream logic I was like ‘she’s the only one who can help me’. I was like ‘Mrs C, please help me’ and she was like ‘ofc’ and hid me in the library office, the password of which was ‘Anthony Trollope’ in my dream. Apart from that all I remember is that my feet were sweating loads and I got worried that would make it easier for the sniffer dogs to find me.”

On reflection it doesn’t seem that these dreams can possibly hold a deep meaning for our future (I haven’t suddenly become clairvoyant? Tragic). It’s probably just a response to a stressful situation but hearing the weird things people’s brains have been coming up with has definitely provided some light relief.

 All images are the author’s own