Exeter Nightlife: What to Wear

Those of you who have spent more than a term in Exeter don’t need to be reminded of the limited night life we have at our disposal.

Many students here will have left the peaceful, tranquil Surrey countryside behind them, yet it is still only a matter of time before they can count every club they have ever been to in this city on their hand. 

By the end of your first term, you will not only know all clubs, pubs, and “edgy” places to go, but you will have begun to differentiate, and most probably chosen which venues will be receiving the rest of your student loan over the next three years.

Therefore, it seems only fair to provide an insight into which attire is suitable for which clubs. I wouldn’t want any Timepiece lovers to take an innocent trip to the Cavern on a Wednesday dressed in their usual athletic ensemble.

Nor would I want any Cellar Door girls to march their generic Nike high tops to the entrance of Arena.

So, for anyone struggling with Exeter’s unspoken dress code rules, below is a guideline, here to help ensure stress-free integration between our clubs.

Mosaic. We’ve all stood in its queues and we’ve all done its drunken twat lap. And if you’re going to spend more than one night a week in there, you DEFINITELY made the right choice in reading this article.

GIRLS: On a Monday high heels, along with tighter clothes, definitely get the stamp of approval. Anything you own from the high street is welcome, but don’t be surprised if 3 other people are wearing the same top as you. By contrast, wearing high heels on a Thursday “Dirty Beats” Mosaic is definitely not OK. You may think you can slip a pair on and get away with it, but trust me it is noted and heavily frowned upon. If you and your friends want to attend this club night, invest in a pair of high waisted denim shorts matched with either a crop top or a collared top. Also the more casual “I’m-a-girl-who-doesn’t-TRY-to-be-attractive” the footwear the better (trainers/high tops).

BOYS: Whether it’s a Monday or a Thursday bring out one of your better wallets, because let’s face it – you’re going to be using it a lot. Some of you will even be throwing it at the barmaid during moments of impatience. Blue trousers, perhaps a Jack Wills or an Urban Outfitters top worn comfortably under your Barbour will work here. Apart from that my only other advice is: on a Thursday Mosaic, you will be less judged for wearing a flat cap, and do not be put off by girls wearing the same shoes as you.

Arena.

GIRLS: If you are a girl, it helps to enter this club with a glowing coat of fake tan. Don’t worry too much about over doing it or looking ‘tangoed’, the more the better. A pair of black high heels and a colourful tight body con dress generally does the trick. Do not wear tights under any circumstances as this pointlessly covers up more flesh than necessary. Furthermore, if you are still painfully fresh then UV paint is socially acceptable here. My final advice would be to wear lots of perfume to deflect the club's unusual smell.

BOYS: I wouldn’t worry too much. Just throw on some jeans and the first Superdry t-shirt you see and if you really want to make that extra effort, simply apply more hair gel. (PLEASE NOTE: SEPARATE RULES APPLY FOR ITCHY FEET EVENTS)

As for Timepiece, the job is almost done for me. Most of you belong to societies which will impose strict and sometimes humiliating outfits for you to wear. I wouldn’t want to upset the balance/social order by suggesting any contradictory items of clothing. Do as you’re told. Dress up if they tell you too. Dress in your chinos/collared top number when they tell you too. Or face the punishments for not. Just don’t be surprised if half way through the night your friends start taking their tops off to the sound of Jimi Jamison singing “I’ll Be Ready” (Baywatch theme tune).

Cellar Door/Cavern.

Naturally grouped together, these clubs have fulfilled the nightlife needs of many students rejected by Bristol University. In terms of fashion it is in many ways an extension of Thursday night Mosaic (refer above). If you’re a girl, wear ripped baggy t-shirts. Shorts and just a boob tube. Wear nothing but your nose ring if you feel like it. Boys? Grab your ONLY NY flat cap. If you’re looking too preppy or clean cut, grease your hair up. Enhance that really cool scar on your face you got from skateboarding/surfing one time –it's more hardcore. Check your jeans are tight. And after all this, pretend you couldn’t care less about what you’re wearing. It’s all about the music anyway.