A Male’s Guide to Sharking

Why do single guys in Exeter like going out? For a sing-along and dance with their mates? Wrong. All guys love a good shark and anyone that says otherwise is quite frankly a liar.

After a heavy pre-drinking session as alcoholic toxins surge through the body, sharking is the primary thing on most boys minds.

I am by no means an expert, but as a guy on a standard night out, it is imperative that you scout the talent fully. There is no point in rocking up and going straight for the pull. Nobody has ever been successful in anything by being hasty. Be patient. This process will allow you to assess who your main targets are and provides a solid foundation for the night’s work.

With your homework now done it’s time to act. You have come so far, don’t bottle it! The alcohol will improve your confidence and now all you have to do is relax and enjoy yourself.

If you are extremely self-confident, you could go straight up to the girl and start dancing/grinding. It could work but this may be seen as creepy and I wouldn’t recommend it. The smarter guys adopt a more subtle approach and stay with a group of friends, making their way towards the girl in question. You should act as if you haven’t seen her and just keep dancing with your mates but maintain a position among them where you can make potential eye contact.

When a boy is sharking, the most important thing for him is making eye contact with a girl and the reaction after will tell you whether to move on or move in. If eye contact is made and she either looks away or doesn’t really react to it, hard luck. Plenty more fish. However, if you get a cheeky smile or even better, a wink, you’re in boy! Don’t get complacent though and think the job is done. There is still a lot to do but you know that the girl may be on it. Just keep dancing with your mates and try and catch her eye for a second time and see the reaction. A second smile or wink? Fantastic form. Make. Your. Move.

This is it. The final hurdle. The time has come for you to approach this girl. You need to be confident and start chatting to her and see what occurs without being forceful. Girls love a guy with good chat. If you have that, you cannot go wrong. Just play it cool and I can guarantee that you will be successful.

A night of sharking for boys not only entails us doing the pursuing, but being sharked upon by drunken girls too. There is always going to be that girl in the club following you around, but you are not particularly interested.

What are you going to do? I’ve never been an advocate of being rude to girls so you need to be subtle with your rejection. First option- general avoidance whenever she comes near you. This is a temporary solution however as some girls don’t know what the word ‘rejection’ means. They are going to be persistent and when they finally make their way to you, you have no other option but to pull out the ‘I’ve got a girlfriend’ card.

You would think this is the end of it. I mean, this would work 80% of the time but you have found yourself confronted by an ultimate keen bean who has been stalking you all night and has seen you getting with three other girls (Lad) and wants to be number four! Girlfriend? Really? As you can see, this is very problematic. There is not much you can do right now but the best thing to do is give her a small dance out of politeness before checking the phone for a ‘text from a mate asking where you are because he has lost everyone’ and inform her of this. That way, you have rejected her but you are probably still in her good books!

Boys of Exeter, this is by no means the sharking Bible but I hope I have helped you. Go forth and shark until your heart’s content, girls await!