Timepiece Wednesday: A spectator’s sport

For us mere mortals who aren’t fortunate enough to be on a sports team, a sober Wednesday night at Timepiece might be our idea of hell.

Think again, as this is the MOST entertaining night of the week. Even without alcohol in your system.

I’ve suddenly seen it for the wonderfully bizarre circus that it is, and, shockingly, I’ve become a TP Wednesday convert.

This is what TP looks like sober

Opening at 8pm before most students have had their dinner, TP attracts the regular sports society members as well as those crazy few who go out mid-week.

It didn’t take long before the competitive drinking began as one sports team downed some crazy VKs to kick off their night.

This was one step too far, as one rugby member threw up next to the bar straight afterwards. But he quickly regained respect by bolting another pint.

Impressive work.

Spectacles like this make you realise why there’s only one place to be on a Wednesday (seriously though, there’s nowhere else to go).

Why go back with someone when you have the TP dancefloor?

Dad?

Soon afterwards, one couple became a casualty of middle floor.

Be warned: this type of going out is not for the faint of heart, so if you find this frivolity horrific, rather than hilarious, you might be better off staying at home watching The One Show.

Later in the queue, Prince William lookalike proved age is just a number. Leaving Duchess Kate behind, he eagerly waited in the queue to grace the ledge on top-top. As long as your ID proves you don’t go to Exeter College, anyone can join the crowd.

But this is no place for a smart shirt, it’s all about fancy dress.

No one knows how to dress like the sports members of Exeter – these girls prove animal print has never been out of fashion.

Classic TP animal behavior

Let’s face it, a Wednesday is a much better option than a Monday.

Where else would you find someone wearing this:

This scarecrow knows how to attract the birds

Reppin’ for team West Country

Don’t be put off though, if dressing up like a tool isn’t your thing, don’t worry, normal people do go too.

Unfortunately, the toilets still leave much to be desired – they were as grim as ever. One girl even resorted to weeing in the sink in desperation.

We’d started the night sober, but by the end we just couldn’t handle it all and resorted to drinking. If you can’t beat them, join them.

Others sported the typical Timepiece attire

Harry Potter society have great bants

The result of breaking the seal…

So if you were ever put off from going out on a Wednesday, please think again. The horror stories you hear may still be true, but what’s better than witnessing them yourself?