The types of people you find in the library

Revision time is always a difficult time. The already packed libraries turn into hotbeds for anxious, stressed and sleep deprived students.

Amongst this pack one can easily discern particular types of people that aim to make our days tiresome, hilarious and, in some cases, rather disgusted…

THE SLEEPER

This breed is typically found inhabiting the library at all hours of the day/night. They rock up to hcc3 at 8am to nab the last remaining computer and set up shop until the early hours of the next morning. People look upon them with dignity, admiring their perseverance and ability to withstand a bodybuilder’s capacity of caffeine.

However, the inevitable slump usually hits around 5pm, and the poor soul is out for the count on the desk, dreaming of a better life than one can find trapped in the oven of a library.

Double whammy

So peaceful, so sweet…SO UNNECESSARY

Annoying though, they could just go home for a nap and come back, leaving the computer free for someone sensible who got their 8 hours sleep in the night. Come on guys, just go home.

THE CHATTY SMOKER

They work for 10 minutes and then announce that they are ‘dying for a bifta’ and march on out to the front of the building. They return an hour later, armed with more cigarettes, more coffee, and more energy to talk in the quiet zone whilst the quiet non-smoker seethes with anger next to them.

The tell-tale signs that you’re going to have a rough day sitting next to this person

THE TRACKSUIT CLAD IDIOT

Apparently a vacuum opens up during exam time where all modes of dress are shunned and some only find it possible to throw on tracksuit pants  reminiscent of a look portrayed in a 90s film. One looks upon them with horror, wondering when they last bothered to do their washing, until they loudly proclaim they’re off to the gym, leaving those who bothered to look in the mirror in peace.

NB. They usually use the term ‘I can bench 400’ with a look of glee on their faces. What does this mean? Why is it relevant? I may not be able to bench over 50 but I can get dressed in the morning.

THE GUILD PRESIDENT

You pop into the Sydney Jones to renew a book, do some work, (not) find a computer, and before you know it you’ve been cornered by an SRO. He’s always there, plying you with tea and coffee to sign yet another petition against some unholy injustice. I’m sure the petitions are very worthwhile and all but until he starts one against public wearing of scrunchies  – STEER CLEAR.

This can only mean one thing: relocate to HC and safety

So that’s where my donation money has been going to…

THE COUPLE

They’ve been separated over Christmas. The two weeks was too much to bear. Thus, lack of lectures means they can be together forever, working simultaneously in the library to annoy and aggravate those who spent midnight on New Year hugging their friends screaming ‘New Year New Fella’. Again: go home.

GO’ED

Courtesy of Spotted: such a treasure trove for the annoying lovers