It’s official! We are the fittest uni in Manchester
Glory for ‘Uni of’ as Man Met fail at yet another aspect of life
The TabManchester University has swiped the crown in the ‘who is the fittest?’ competition.
We’re better at pretty much everything, and now we’ve officially pipped the poly to the post as the buffest uni in Manchester.
Single Stefan won the students of Manchester over
The chiselled-jawed boys of Manchester stormed to victory in The Tab’s vote last week.
And here’s a scientific breakdown of the win:
We scooped a huge 81% of the vote in last week’s poll, while it was an embarrassing defeat for MMU who only managed to rack up 126 votes.
So we’re not only just academically superior, we’re now officially physically superior too. And it’s hardly surprising with the likes of Markus, Merlin and Stefan on our side.
Model and medic Merlin was on team Manchester Uni
Our main man Markus looking smug after storming to victory
So it was unlucky for these boys:
So long Patrick
Bad luck Brian
Sorry Aaron
Sofia Sarosh
Manchester University’s Alan Gilbert building painted orange by Just Stop Oil protesters
Lucas AnnisonThe protester was arrested shortly afterwards by Greater Manchester Police
Planning application submitted for redevelopment of Fallowfield campus
Rebecca MurphyThe plans include redevelopment of Owens Park, Woolton Hall and Oak House
Seven alternative nights out for Manchester freshers that don’t involve booze
Save your bank account and wake up fresh as a daisy
Warnings issued in Manchester after circulation of super strength MDMA pills
Drug harm reduction resource MANDRAKE has tested pills with extremely high doses of MDMA
ALIVE: Manchester’s student-run festival is back with a bang this month
Molly WilkinsonCome and check out over 30 student artists for the price of a pint
University of Manchester announces Nightline closure
The service provided confidential overnight support for students
Manchester students left without water for six days
Students have been advised they can shower at a gym one mile away
UCU strikes paused at Uni of Manchester after proposal from university bosses
Anna McIvorFour days of strike action already took place last week
Six of the most unique societies at the University of Manchester
Now that your Freshers’ wristband has expired, have a look at what else Manchester has to offer besides 256
Looking for a new society? Come and write for us at The Manchester Tab
Come to our open meeting on 26th September at 7pm!
University of Manchester has ranked 23rd in The Times Good University Guide
Francesca EkeThe uni has risen one place since last year’s league table
Manchester freshers: This is what your choice of nightclub says about you
Daniel McphersonDon’t worry, we all thought Factory was brilliant once
Manchester University lecturers announce strike dates for the beginning of term
The strikes will last up to nine days
‘It’s laughable’, Manchester students given £500 for not having degrees before graduation say
Izzy Schifano‘I’m £60k in debt with no degree to show for it’
Manchester University is giving £500 to all final years who don’t have their marks by graduation
Thanks guys but I would quite like to have my actual degree too x
From Blue 2 to Jet 2: What your summer plans as a Manchester student say about you
We’ve all met someone who’s done number seven….
Manchester students told hackers will release ‘life destroying’ data unless uni pays ransom
They also claim students can pay a ‘small fee’ to not have their data leaked
Man who killed 19-year-old Manchester Met student Luke O’Connor sentenced to 15 years
Luke was stabbed to death in Fallowfield last year after coming home from a Halloween party
Co-star romances and age-gap relationships: All of Paul Hollywood’s biggest controversies
Lydia Spencer-ElliottHe’s back handing out handshakes on another series of The Great British Bake Off
Boo! These are officially the most haunted UK unis in 2023, based on ghost sightings
Emily SmithThere have been 59 ghost sightings at one UK uni
MAFS gossip column: Jordan responds to fight scandal and cast knew each other before the show?!
Hayley SoenThe drama really never ends!
Tour buses and family dramas: A brief history of One Direction’s run-ins with the law
Liam Payne has just had his driver’s license suspended
‘You’re scared to step outside’: Two women share their stories of being stalked at uni
This doesn’t only happen to celebrities like Holly Willoughby
Another one! People spot a further editing error in MAFS questioning a staged dinner
Nothing is sacred anymore
Um, the video of Georges squatting has been revealed and you absolutely have to watch it
Ellie RingGive this man all the baguettes
Attention pickpocket! The uni cities where you’re most likely to have your phone stolen
I’m switching back to a Nokia brick after this
Meet Lauren Sintes: The 27-year-old model joining the cast of Made in Chelsea
Of course she’s well connected with most of the cast
Rugby boys and the cleaning rota: Just 19 uni things that are none of my business
The hygiene rating of my fave kebab shop has nothing to do with me!
From secret hookups to cheating: All the biggest bombshells from the Love Is Blind reunion
I’m in shock at all of these
Why do posh people sleep with all their mates? A very serious investigation
The Made in Chelsea mayhem has gone on long enough
‘You’ve made a c*** of yourself’: Shona shares off-screen chat that saw Brad axed from MAFS
‘Bradley said he was behaving like a caged animal’
MAFS UK star Chanita Stephenson calls out the current cast for being a ‘bit too wild!’
She thinks they’re on the show ‘for fun’ and are not ‘focusing on their marriages’
‘Go f**k yourself’: Luke calls out ‘snake’ in MAFS cast who ‘sold’ story of him having a fight
It was revealed today Luke has been removed from the show following a physical fight
Luke has been AXED from Married at First Sight UK following physical fight with Jordan
The incident was caught on camera