
Dress your way out of a hangover
You don’t have to look that shit
It’s now 10am and if you were cut open right now only vodka would come out. But life doesn’t stop for your hangover, so suck it up and fool everyone instead.
The sunglasses
Blues Brother or Lindsay Lohan?
A classic. Some say too obvious, but better people think you misjudged the weather than see the eyes behind them.
Wash off those stamps
X marks the spot
Nothing says I’d rather be lying in a dark room more than an X on the back of your hand.
Style out yesterday’s clothes if you have to
Um yeah, I picked out these this morning actually
You don’t get the same looks walking along in a beer soaked shirt or in heels with a clutch bag at 11am that you do at 11pm. Walk with your head held high like maybe you chose this outfit today.
Stay fresh
Spray on any fragrance you can. The thought of perfume/aftershave having alcohol in may make you want to cry tears of pure spirits but you need it. Anything that covers the scent of tequila will do.
The 2 minute makeover
Your new magic wand. With great power comes great responsibility
Just do your brows. Anyone with passable eyebrows looks like they have their life together. Also, wear bright lipstick (everyone will look at it and not your eyes). Also recommended for boys.
Sit next to someone who looks more hungover
Yep, you’ll do
Great for lectures. Find the person who looks like they made the most mistakes in the past 12 hours and sit next to them, they are now your new best friend. Same idea as the lipstick.
The hangover shirt
Wear something inconspicuous
Everyone needs one – make it oversized and soft. But don’t wear the same one every time, or people start to catch on.
Get the drinks in
‘But this is the only water bottle I have’
No, not hair of the dog. Ditch the coffee, get a bottle of water and drop a Vitamin C tablet in it. People may think it’s wine, don’t correct them, they won’t believe you anyway.
Put your headphones in, but no music
Not that you need to drown out the beautiful sounds of the 142
Your head is pounding its own bassline, you don’t need music. However, it screams “don’t talk to me” and the noises around you get quieter. Win-win.
And, if all else fails, just physically hide.