Bristol soars into the top 10 unis in the UK

Bristol ranks in the impressive top 70 unis in the world.

According to the Times Higher Education’s 2015-16 edition of the World University Rankings, we’re the 9th best uni in the UK.

Maybe if Durham, St Andrews and Exeter spent less time consoling Hectors and Hatties over their Oxbridge rejection and more time improving their universities they too could rank as high as we did.

But they didn’t. And we’re better than them because we finished 69th in this not at all arbitrary league table.

Things are looking good for Bristol, especially after the fantastic revelation that we are one of the top 20 universities in the UK.

If being a top 70 uni doesn’t want to make you party nothing will!

If you listen to The Guardian however, we’re not so great. Our student satisfaction is pretty low, only 65% of us are satisfied with the feedback we receive and UEA, Strathclyde and Aston are better than us.

Things could be worse though. Unfortunately our neighbours over at UWE didn’t do so well in the Times rankings, narrowly missing out on a spot in the top 600.

Bristol second year Cat Parfitt was thrilled to hear how the University of Bristol performed in the rankings and wanted to thank all the other universities in the world for taking part.

“It’s cute of them to show up but we basically beat them all lol”

Fellow second year Tim Thorne seemed a little less excited about the news.

“I’d trade a place outside the Top 70 for a seat in the ASS library.”