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What his Tinder caption tells you about how he will fuck up your life

Work hard, play hard, CEO @ self-employed

Girls tell us why watching men cry is literally the hottest thing ever

My ovaries hurt

Which one of these tragic Valentine’s Day starter packs is you right now?

I swear to God, if I see another ‘spontaneous’ trip to Paris

There are eight types of fit people at uni and we know exactly how many of them are at yours

A study based on scientific facts

There’s a theory that Sam Smith and Adele are actually the same person

Pls hear me out

All Greggs’ Valentine’s meals sold out in less than 20 minutes

Is this Glastonbury orrrrr

Lidl ripoffs that are so shameless they should probably just apologise to the original brand

Nutella? Don’t you mean Notella

Spencer Matthews just proposed to his girlfriend on a Lion King backstage theatre tour

You’d at least want it to be Les Mis

Which one of these uni girl starter packs accurately reflects your life?

You’re the Hot Mess, aren’t you?

I was at the Presidents Club afterparty – old creepy men treated us like prostitutes

Six student hostesses tell us how they were pressured for sex at a private party after the charity dinner

Greggs is doing a four-course £15 Valentine’s meal for two and you can book a table

Because nothing says ‘I Love You’ like a sausage roll

Here’s how to get NUS card discounts when you’re not really a student

One FREE cheeseburger please

Haven’t got a grad job sorted? You can travel the world with Prince Harry and Meghan Markle for £22k a year

Probs better than moving back home tbh

Here is what actually counts as ‘living in London’, decided by the number of Prets

Don’t even talk to me about ‘Greater London’

If for some reason your uni was an iconic food chain, this is what it would be

If you got Prezzo you should probably drop out

The bakery, speedy checkouts, the random aisle: Things you will only understand if you are a true believer in Lidl

Their baked goods should be available on the NHS

Prince William is the latest posh boy to shave his head

Can’t wait to see him in the smoking area with a Red Stripe

Take our 2018 Free Speech Survey and tell us what you actually think

Don’t no platform us

Take this bleak quiz and we’ll tell you which Black Mirror episode reflects your soul

You never know, it could be one of the nice ones

This new app sends a ‘legal request’ for sexual consent during one night stands

Ah, so this is what 2018 looks like

Rita Ora might actually be the most irrelevant popstar of all time

She peaked at R.I.P and why is she still famous, again?