‘Sowy Baby’: 14 Warwick students share their biggest dating icks

Reading this will give you more reasons to stay single

3 years ago

Guides

The world of dating can be a pretty difficult one to navigate. One minute you’re head over heels for someone, completely infatuated and planning your wedding, but the next you’ve been thrown by something they’ve done and now you can’t stand to look at them.

Enter the “ick”. That awful cringey feeling you get around someone which makes you Chrissy Teigen grimace and yeet yourself back into the friendzone and well beyond.

Sometimes icks can be pretty understandable, like your date smelling gross or being rude to you, and other times there is no explaining them whatsoever. We’ve sourced the most popular and *questionable* icks from Warwick students themselves so you can add them to your list (you know who you are), or you can know what to avoid for next time (again, you know who you are).

Woody, 18- ‘Dry/slow replies’

This is something that annoys everyone. I’m not waiting three to five working days for an “okay”- we can all agree that 24 hours is enough time to reply, especially as most people have attachment issues with their phones these days (i.e me).

‘When they ask me to cook for them’

Sorry, at what point did I sign up to be your housewife/husband? Cook your own damn food, or better yet, Deliveroo it.

Never cook for anyone whose frying pan looks like this. You won’t ever get cooked for in return.

Josh, 18- ‘Chewing with their mouth open’

Oh my god, this one is basic manners. You were raised by humans, not barn animals, so act like it. No one signed up for a live ASMR recording featuring your saliva and mushy food. How am I meant to kiss that mouth after I’ve seen your food rolling around in it? No thanks.

Elyas, 18- ‘Baby Talk’

You’ll probably find that it’s the rugby lads who are into the likes of “sowy baby” *doe-eyed baby face* and “awwwwwwwww I wuv you the mostest baby” *more doe-eyed baby face*.

That was so painful to write.

If you managed to read all of that, you achieved something today. I’m proud of you

Reya, 18- ‘Bad grammar’

It’s 2022. Our technology is more advanced than our government. Their’s no excuse.

And if you can’t recognise the sarcasm, I just got the ick from you for “Lacking a sense of humour”.

Usman, 20- ‘Comparing me to others, hunny I’m my own person’

Period.

Niamh, 18- ‘When they don’t like Taylor Swift and like Jake Gyllenhaal’

Bit niche but I agree. Immediate red flag. Baby now we’ve got bad blood.

Red (Teddy’s Version)

Lottie, 18- ‘Disrespecting their mum’

A mother’s love is unconditional; she carried you for nine months, wiped your shit, fed you (still feeds you) and will always put you first despite having a million other things to do. Your mum is a real person too, you better respect her.

Omair, 18- ‘People who are into horoscopes’

OOOH a controversial one! Horoscopes become horror stories when they say they can’t breathe the same air as you because their star sign said you’re not compatible. Would you date BoJo if you were deemed “compatible”?

(I’d consider it ngl)

Anyone know if Boris owns any yachts?

Tanisha, 18- ‘When they press the traffic light button and wait for the green light before crossing’

This girl likes her men how she likes her chicken- dead.

Jack, 18- ‘Texting the word hehe’

I guess Michael Jackson wouldn’t have made it.

Jack then confirmed: “It kinda makes the person sounds like a nonce.” Yeah, definitely not Michael Jackson then.

Gauri, 21- ‘Watching them eat Cheese strings’

I didn’t even realise these are still sold, but this person must still feel the painful effects of watching someone bite into it rather than peel it. But then even peeling it is a bit odd. Hmmm, maybe just avoid all cheese string eating when around your S.O?

And whilst we’re here, it’s the cereal before the milk. And milk after the tea bag.

Clearly wasn’t peeling well.

Viraj, 19- ‘No eye contact when talking’

We all know it can be hard to hold eye contact with someone you’ve just met, but when they’re having a conversation with the air around you, it’s time to send them off to the nearest Specsavers and walk away.

‘When they can’t handle their drink on a night out’

Everything was going well until suddenly your face becomes a chunder target and you’re left looking after a child (James Charles stay away).

Feeling salty because they just had tequila good night out… hahaha get it? To kill a? No? Ok.

Maansi, 19- ‘When they wear their trousers so fucking low their whole arse is out’

No saggy bottoms please. You may have those apple bottom jeans but for the love of god pull them up, no one wants to see your M&S Autograph collection underwear your Mum bought you with her Sparks card.

‘Lip biting and looking me up and down like I’m a piece of meat’

Do I look like a Chicken McNugget McShareBox from the McSavers McMenu? McNo.

Anjali, 19- ‘The basics tbh, like when they breathe and eat and drink’

This girl also likes her men dead.

And if you’ve got to the end of this thinking you agree with at least half of these, I wish you the very best in finding your ideal partner. Seriously, good fucking luck.