What the £7,000 accommodation fees could buy you instead
Why are you in Trevs when you could be in Adelaide?
The recently announced surge in accommodation fees has caused outrage in Durham this week, with the cost of living in college reaching almost £7,000 per year.
After the grim reaper himself led a candlelit funeral to the Billy B, and with the new raised fees set to be enforced in the next academic year, here is what else you could be splurging on instead of paper thin walls and arctic temperatures.
48 weeks rent on a house in South Adelaide
At just $290 a week and a 25 minute drive from the beach, its difficult to comprehend why you are forking out the same price for your college prison cell and a few dodgy potatoes.
42 weeks rent on a flat in Newcastle
If commuting from Adelaide to Durham is a bit too far for you, £7,000 will allow you to rent a one bedroom flat in Newcastle for around 10 months. You could have your own living room, kitchen, bathroom and bedroom and be only a 10 minute train journey away from lectures. Instead you have a room that looks out onto the bins.
466 bottles of Smirnoff
Put down the Tesco value. The university are assuming we have a spare £7,000 to throw away annually but realistically, you would much rather spend it on a lengthy supply of premium vodka.
A two week 5* New Year Barbados getaway
First class flights and 5* accommodation for when you countdown into 2016 on the sandy beaches. Alternatively you could be paying for a room you’re not actually living in for four weeks over Christmas.
A boob job (with leftover money for liposuction)
A basic rate for a breast enlargement comes in at around £4,000 leaving your £3k up to spend on lipo too. You can literally build yourself a new body, NEW YEAR NEW YOU! But instead you’re in Trevs.
14 golden labrador puppies
You may not have paid for a college room but who needs a bed when you have 14 Andrex puppies? Think of how much your BNOC status will be enhanced, someone will surely offer you their floor to sleep on for the year.
35,000 overdue library books
Bill Bryson fines stand at 20p a day for your overdue books, you could pay for 35,000 books at once or alternatively you could take one book out for 95 years.